Secrets She Kept 2: Lovers and Demons
by Living and Loving123
Summary: Sequel to Secrets She Kept Zuko has slowly become her only constant.Together they joined the Avatar, joining their destiny's. But now, as her 17th birthday approaches and it becomes harder and harder to hide the truth about herself and her past she has to choose between the man she is devoted to,and the truth she cannot escape... because she could never have both.
1. New Friends, Old Habits

_**When we last left our duo, they were escaping the firenation, friendship restored. Through all their hardships, they still maintained the trust they had in each other and were going towards their destiny's together…**_

_**Chapter 1**_

_**New Friends, Old Habits**_

"Ok um... Look I know I've done bad things before... even though I thought I was good, I wasn't... you know with all the trying to capture you and all and well-"

"Stop!" Zuko whirled around and stared at Kunai thin lipped and wide eyed.

"How long-"

"Long enough." The slight air of attitude melted as she strode through their tiny camp to him, smiling sadly.

"Relax. Let me do all the talking, that'll work right?" Zuko sighed and nodded. She definitely had a better way with words than he did. Kunai smiled and bounced just slightly on her toes.

"We should go now. It's about half an hour walk to the temple." Before he was allowed any input she was making her way down an invisible path, beckoning one handedly for him to follow.

As they walked, he stole quick glances at her, the spring in her step, the slight smile on her lips. The same lips he'd kissed that night in Ba-Sing-Se, the same lips he would've given anything to kiss while he was combing the city for her with the mentality they were meant to be. He shook the thoughts of unresolved feelings away and grittily inquired about her cheerfulness. In response she sighed deeply and shrugged.

"I guess... For once there's something I'm meant to do... that I want to do." Her voice softened and her lips twitched at the edges. Zuko smirked slightly, though he couldn't relate to her unhindered sentiment. He was still unsure of his fate as rejection loomed in the air, known but unsaid.

When they reached the ledge leading down to the temple and faint voices could be heard, Kunai gulped deeply, her heart racing. It began to settle in that this was among one of the most pivotal decision she'd ever made.

_Kunai secured the flap of her tent with shacking hands and lowered herself into her bedding. She wanted to forget, that's all she wanted. But now she had a permanent reminder of her shortcoming, her mistake. Her friends asked how she was doing daily. What could she say? Lie and say she was fine? Break down and admit that every day she hated waking up because she knew she had failed and was going to fail countless people? She robotically unsheathed a knife from her hip, a treasured gift plated in gold and inscribed with her name. As she examined the glimmering metal she rubbed the soft skin on her forearm. She lowered the blade to her arm and sucked in a breath. She didn't have to do this. Crazy girls did this._

_Maybe she wanted to be crazy. It provided and excuse._

_She pressed down, dragging it along her skin and leaving behind a dripping trail of crimson, dripping away the pain. Something of a sick smile crossed her face and salty tears stained her cheeks as she created an inscription of her own_

_SLUT._

Kunai pulled herself from the painful flashback and hopped down onto the main tier of the temple, cushioning her fall with a gust of air. She wandered towards the voice until the came across a great beast, resting in the sun. The bison turned to her, batting his thick lashes as he examined her. Kunai bit her lip and placed a finger to her lips, halfheartedly trying to keep him quiet. None too obedient, Appa bellowed lethargically and lumbered over to the side, revealing her to the surprised group of kids. Instantly recognizing her, Katara jumped forward, fists clenched.

"What are you doing here!" Kunai kneaded her lip.

"I... I wanted to join you." She inwardly winced at how pathetic she sounded but now was not be time for pride. She could see the confusion written all over their faces and with a heavy sigh she stepped forward to explain.

"Look. You... you're the Avatar right?" The young boy nodded curiously.

"I had this dream and... Well I think I'm supposed to help you. This spirit guy, he told me I was the Avatar's Apprentice, that's why I can bend all the elements." The group shared shocked looks but stayed silent, turning back to her.

"I dont claim to understand all this Spirit stuff but I can't ignore that. It's gotta mean something." The young boys gray eyes sparkled and a wide smile split his face.

"That's amazing! She has to join us!" Katara clenched her jaw, her eyes widening in disbelief.

"But she-"

"Thanks but I..." Kunai glanced to the side, noting the small flash of red nearing the corner.

"I'm not alone." The tiny girl who had been silent up until now snorted.

"Got that right." From behind the pillar Zuko walked nervously to her side. All but Toph gasped and jumped to a defensive position. Katara shot a nasty scowl at Kunai, inwardly berating herself for not seeing this coming.

"You tricked us!" Kunai put up her hands in defense.

"No no! I-"

"I should've known something was up since I saw you too in the caves together!" The older water tribe boy snarled and spoke up.

"What is this, some kind of trick! Get us to trust you so you can sneak us all to the fire nation!"

"NO!" Zuko screamed, taking a defensive step forward. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed deeply, remembering the importance of composure.

"Kunai Is a powerful bender and I'm a skilled fire bender. That's the reason we came here." Aang narrowed his eyes.

"Toph?"

"They're both telling the truth." she said flatly. The young boy wavered momentarily before dropping from defense.

"Aang!" Sokka and Katara protested in unison.

"Well Zukos done a lot of terrible things but she's never hurt us." Katara scoffed at him.

"They're obviously working together! What are you thinking!"

Aang sighed and gave her a sincere look of apology before turning to the nervous pair of teens.

"You can stay with us but Zuko has to go. I'm not gonna jeopardize our safety." he said authoritatively. Kunai gazed at him, thinking about his proposal. Sure she would be accepted but Zuko, would be alone. She was no master fire bender; she could never teach him all there was to know. She looked over at Zuko who was staring at her stone faced, yet a hint of sadness in his eyes. He grumbled something and turned to leave, casting his eyes at th ground when she grabbed his shoulder.

"No... If he goes... I go." Zuko looked up at her in shock, receiving a weak smile from her.

"I know he's done horrible things but he's changed. If you can't accept that then-" Zuko stepped in front of her

"If you can accept me as a part of the group then accept me as your prisoner." He fell to his knees and bowed his head. Katara growled deeply.

"No we won't!" She bent of jet of water hurtling towards the boy on his knees. Kunai reacted quickly and redirected it, sending the stream against the far wall. She pulled slightly on Zukos shoulder and he stood slowly. She stayed, eyes locked on Kataras as she began to walk away only tearing them away from the death glare as she turned the corner, Zuko not far behind. Once they were gone Toph clenched her fists and stomped her foot deep into the ground, sending a small earthquake through the temple.

"What is wrong with you! A fire bending master and some ransoms super bending girl just shows up on a silver platter and you won't even think about it!"

"He's fire nation! He's probably just using her to get us to trust him so he can signal his little fire nation buddies!" he growled angrily. Aang nodded in agreement.

"Why would she go with him if they werent working together!" Toph let out a howl of frustration and stomped away mumbling about how stupid her friends were.

"I'm beginning to wonder who the blind one is around here!"

* * *

"Why did you do that!" Zuko screamed once they were out of ear shot. Kunai glared at him and grit her teeth.

"Do what? I was sticking up for you! I thought that's what you wanted!" Her anger dissipated to hurt quickly. Zuko let out a frustrated groan and kept walking.

"They need you more than they need me." he murmured to himself, not thinking she could hear him.

"No they don't." she replied softly. He turned to her, slightly embarrassed.

"Look, Kunai. If you really want this, go ahead. I can take care of myself." He tried to walk of again when she grabbed his hand, forcing him around.

"I know that. It's just..." She sighed deeply. Ego be damned, she had to explain.

"You've been with me this whole time. If it wasn't for you I would've died in that alley. I owe you a lot. If I'd gone with them then you never would've gotten the chance to and I know you want this... probably more than me." Zuko nervously kneaded his lip between his teeth. For what seemed like he umpteenth time she was right and that was oddly comforting. He didn't want to think of how desperate he was to gain the Avatar's acceptance. Then again, he'd literally thrown himself at the boy's feet. Kunai stepped closer to him.

"We'll try again soon. For now, let's just get back to camp." He gave a silent agreement and let her tug him (by the hand) back to their tiny camp. They were both spent so they retired to either side of the tent and fell asleep within minutes of each other.

* * *

Zuko was awoken by a small thud. He opened his eyes and let out a small groan, trying to shake the last bits of sleep. He listened carefully for anything else when he heard it again, louder, closer.

"Get back!" He screamed and sat up, sending a wild wall of fire towards the noise. He heard a shriek and saw a little girl, the blind earth bender collapsed back with her scorched feet in the air. Kunai shot up, eyes wide in confusion.

"What's going on?" she grumbled. Zuko didn't answer. He jumped up and ran after the girl who was crawling surprisingly fast.

"Wait! Im sorry! It was an accident!" he yelled after her. She seemed none too interested as she continued sending random chunks of earth in his direction.

"W-wait! I can heal you!" Zuko turned to Kunai running towards him. This interested Toph and she stopped her scorned assault.

"You're a healer?" she demanded. Kunai ran over to her and knelt down, drawing the water out of the grass around her.

"I'm not really good but I've dealt with burns." Toph pursed her lips but nodded, rolling over and holding her feet up. Zuko watched in fascination as Kunai placed the liquid over the bumbling wounds. A bright blue glow emanated from the water as Kunai worked at the injured flesh. She sighed and pulled her hands away, discarding the murky water quickly.

"That's all I can do. It should feel better soon but it won't completely heal for a few days." Toph wriggled her toes, wincing slightly but noting an obvious change.

"Well that'll work. But since I still can't walk..." Zuko and Kunai nodded, silently moving to either side of her and hoisting her up before walking back to the temple.

It was nearly sunrise when they arrived in the quiet pavilion. They lowered Toph down on the fountain, lack of sleep catching up with them.

"I'm sorry I couldn't help more." Kunai said softly.

"Oh... you've done enough." Their confusion was answered when the three others emerged quietly from where they had been watching the 3.

"Still think their evil? See, she fixed my feet!" She held her feet up and smiled wide. Sokka scowled and sent an accusing glare at Zuko.

"You burnt her!" he demanded. Zuko gulped, his nervousness peaked.

"Oh relax Snoozles. It was an accident." Kunai dared break the staring match her between her and Katara to speak to the whole group.

"She's right. She woke him up suddenly, we didn't mean for anyone to get hurt." Sokka sputtered angrily, searching in vain for an argument to permanently damnate the Prince. With a sigh he dropped his head and looked at Aang.

"It's your call." he murmured. Aang silently cursed this situation. On one hand, Zuko was... Well Zuko. The same Zuko who's tried to capture him for the past several months of his life. On the other hand he seemed sincere and he the girl was a gift from the spirits, quite literally. He could use whatever help he could get.

"Fine... we'll let you be a part of our group."

"Aang!" Katara shrieked, grasping his shoulder.

"I need a fire bending teacher, Katara." Aang said softly. Sokka nodded reluctantly.

"He's right Katara." Feeling painfully outnumbered, Katara crossed her arms and her eyes darkened. With a final stomp of her foot she stormed off, grumbling to herself that they'd see. Feeling he had nothing else to do here, Aang walked off to get much needed sleep. Toph formed an earth tent around herself leaving only Sokka standing there awkwardly.

"Uh I guess I could show you to your room I guess." He motioned for them to follow and lead them down the immense halls of the temple to a small room.

"It's the closest room to where we are so yeah... we uh... haven't really found any others anywhere near here so I guess you guys can share for now or... whatever." With a tiny wave Sokka briskly escaped the awkward situation, leaving the two alone.

Zuko looked to Kunai. Her eyes were wide and sparkling with happiness. Try as he must he couldn't contain the small smile that came in response.

"We did it." she whispered. His smile grew a bit more, his own heart swelling at the thought. He could see it would take more than a little adjustment and they may never be real friends. However, this was not about friendship. This was about something bigger. He sat back on the bed as a yawn racked his body. Kunai laid across the bed and poked his in the rib with her toe.

"I'm not sleeping on the floor. I lay this way, you lay the other?" He nodded sleepily and laid back, nestling his legs next to hers and drifting into the most peaceful sleep he'd had in a while.

* * *

"Dammit! Of all the assassins you had to choose him!" Kunai blindly sent random ice blades in the general direction of the man perched on the ledge with full intent on of blowing them all up.

"I told you he set us up!" Katara growled angrily as she lept behind another pillar closer to the fountain, avoiding a close blast. Zuko snarled at her and sent a barrage of fire balls at the assailant, only stopping when Kunai pulled him back behind the wall and the place he'd been standing exploded.

"You think I hired an assassin to kill me too!"

"You know what would be nice? If the three of you would... STOP FIGHTING AND FOCUS ON THE FACT WE'RE ALL ABOUT TO DIE!" Sokka scolded them. He watched closely as another blast struck the temple. Then, to the chorus of several protests, he ran into the open and tossed his boomerang with precision straight into the third eye of the assassin. At first, the large man seemed unfazed. He glared spitefully and sucked in a deep breath, aiming straight for the boy however there was no explosion, rather momentary panic until he suddenly exploded into nothing. Sokka let out an excited cheer and as he wielded his weapon victoriously.

"Score one for boomerang!" Kunai chuckled and ran over to him.

"That was amazing! Where'd you get the boomerang?" Sokka beamed at the inquiry and puffed out his chest proudly, twirling the boomerang in his hands.

"Authentic water tribe weaponry." he stated. Kunai giggled to herself, finding he reminded her of the boys she grew up with, willed and prideful with the disposition of a Baby PandaSeal.

_"Get off me! Get of me! Im out! I lose!" The younger boy squirmed underneath his friend who chuckled and finally rolled off him._

_"Gorou, I must say, for a little kid, you're a worthy opponent." Gorou playfully punched the older boy, smoothing his thick black hair back._

_"One, I'm 16. Two, you're a cheat." The older boy smiled and stood up, pulling the young boy to his feet._

_"Never said I couldn't cheat."_

_"Screw you Crico! And come on, all I asked is whether or not you and Emi were fu-"_

_"Gourou!" A young girl's voice cut him short and his swallowed the curse, smiling and walking over to the little girl. She smiled small and hugged him._

_"Hi! I couldn't find you." The 10 year old's voice was suddenly sad as she gazed up at him with big violet eyes, not seeing the thoughtful stare Crico was giving her._

_"Oh! Sorry Kunai. I shoulda told you we were out here." She have him a nod and a gap toothed grin._

_"Can we go to the carnival tonight! Please please please please!" He smiled and opened his mouth to answer when Crico cut in._

_"Na man! We were going bar hopping to tonight!" Gorou sighed, looking between one of his best friends and his little sister. He sighed deeply then turned to Kunai._

_"Carnival it is Sissy!" Kunai squealed happily and hugged him around the waist, burying her face in his stomach._

_"You're the best big brother in the whole world!" Gorou smiled and hugged her back. He glanced over his shoulder, seeing a rather amused smirk from his friend._

_"Ill meet you back at camp in a little bit Sissy." The little girl nodded and let go of him. She began to turn to run off, catching the glare and slight smirk from the older man. She held his gaze for a moment before turning on a dime and running off, waving as she disappeared into the woods. Gorou smiled after her as a hand clamped down on his shoulder._

_"You're a good man Gorou... good man."_

Sokka continued on about his beloved boomerang.

"It's hand carved out of elephant whale bone." he went on, turning it over to explain the markings. Zuko was watching the interaction silently, an unwelcomed pang in his chest. It wasn't jealousy. Not at all. The thought was ludicrous but it lingered all the same. The more he thought about it, the more his chest hurt, the more it seemed plausible that he was actually jealous, the more he hated it. He grumbled to Aang that they still needed to continue their fire bending lesson and quietly sulked off. Toph snorted.

"Hey Sugar Plum, what's up with Sparky?" She made a mental note to find a fitting nickname for Kunai.

Kunai watched Zuko oddly, noticing how tense he was.

"I dunno..."

"Hey Kunai! I got a space sword if you wanna see!" Sokka yelped. Kunai turned her attention back to him nodding eagerly and following close behind him as he began to tell her about his training with Piando. He looked over her. She was cute, a water tribe girl other than his sister was refreshing and she liked weapons. But he'd gotten to know her a bit over the past 3 weeks she'd been with them. As fun as she was she had a no nonsense vibe to her and he was all nonsense. Whatever it was, she was no longer a love interest possibility but was perfect as a lady friend.

* * *

Zuko looked up from the bowl of rice he'd been poking for the past 10 minutes, noticing something was still missing; two something's to be exact.

"Where's Kunai?" he asked to no one in particular. Everyone shrugged except for Toph who scooted closer to them, waiting for everyone to fall back to their personal conversations.

"Her and Snoozles have been in his room messing around for the past hour."

"WHAT!" He was glad she could not see the unnaturally brilliant shade of crimson his face turned. However, everyone else did and stared at him in confusion and slight fear. Embarrassed and seething he crossed his arms and stared into the fire, trying not to burn everyone by accident.

Maybe he was overreacting. Maybe it was just a trick of words. It made more sense for that they were simply wasting time and that's what Toph had met, however he was having a hard time making sense right now. They'd hit it off from the beginning and the way she was smiling and laughing at him... He wasn't even funny!

"You're too much!" Kunai laughed as her and Sokka stumbled towards the others, arms around each other's shoulder. Zuko glanced at them and immediately clenched his jaw to the point of pain. Her hair was ruffled, her clothes slightly wrinkled and both of them had a slight shine of sweat.

"Well aren't I good?" Sokka replied. Zuko pulled his eyes away. His throat went dry, his eyes bulged. He was hoping, praying, waiting for them to say something, anything to unravel to innuendo and make him less eager burn Sokka to ashes.

"Well I'll give you that. You were pretty good." _Kill me now. _Zuko tried to control himself, tried to think clearly. He knew Kunai and she just was not the type to sleep with any random (weird looking, stupid, childish, stuck up, all around worthless) kid. But then again, he couldn't claim to know a lot about what she would and wouldn't do. Maybe he was overanalyzing the situation. Maybe it was all-

"Trust me." Sokka said in a low sultry voice as they got closer.

"There's more where that came from." _No more_. Zuko scrambled to his feet and stormed off, smoke and sparks flying from his fingertips. Everyone watched in confusion as the disgruntled Prince ran off.

"What's up with him?" Sokka inquired, more interested in the bowl of rice in front of him. A large mischievous grin split Toph's face.

"Sparky's just jealous." Toph singsonged loudly, a far off spike in vibrations confirming Zuko had heard her. While Kunai frowned, Sokka smiled proudly, dramatically stretching back.

"Yep. My manliness is pretty intimidating." He purposely ignored the groups' collective groan. Toph laughed and shook her head.

"Right Snoozles. But I think he was more jealous about you and Kunai getting bi-zay!" Aang frowned in confusion. The Duke, Teo and Haru started laughing hysterically. Katara cast a terrifying scowl on her brother and his companion, seriously considering what it would take to kill them simultaneously. Sokka was sputtering incoherently while Kunai was staring at the ground, in a trance like state.

Toph laughed until she was red in the face and rolled around on the ground. Slowly she sat up, panting and rubbing her sore stomach.

"That was rich." The tension was still palpable so she decided to break her little charade to avoid death-by-Katara.

"Relax people! I was kidding. But doesn't know that yet." Kunai only seemed to hear the last sentence.

"So Zuko thinks..." he voice trailed off to a whisper. She suddenly jumped up and bolted away with nothing more than a whimper as she tried to conceal the tears in her eyes. Toph didn't show it, but she privately lamented on her plan backfiring. She had no doubt that Sweet Cheeks (not the one) was crying as she ran off and that was not the kind of upset she had intended.

"We were just looking at my weapons!" Sokka finally completed a sentence, the innuendo not lost on the three boys who fell back into uncontrollable giggles. Sokka smacked his forehead.

* * *

Sex. So that's what Zuko thought she'd been doing with a boy she'd only known 3 weeks.

Kunai turned the thought over in her head. She was sitting on the ledge of the temple, gazing up at the sky like there were answers hidden amongst the stars, some directions out of this mess.

It was no use. No matter how hard she tried she couldn't help but land upon the same thought. If Zuko thought she'd do that, then what did Sokka think? Was she really that much of a flirt, a tease? Did what she see as friendly really seem like a come on? Did her best friend really think she was that easy?

She pulled her knees to her chest, more tears coming as she filled with regret. She should have never been hanging all over him; she should've never touched him like she did whilst they sparred. She should've never laughed at him the way she did. She should've never kissed Zuko in that alley.

Maybe then he wouldn't see a slut when he looked at her.

She was bawling by now, tears pouring and gasping for air. She clenched her jaw and sucked in a deep breath, willing herself into composure. She gulped deeply past the knot in her sore throat and wiped her eyes. As she stood she noticed her skirt had pulled up, revealing a scar on her leg that, when viewed closely, faintly read WHORE. She touched it slightly and sucked in another obstinate breath. She promised herself she would not be that weak again. However, something, somewhere, began to crumble.

* * *

Kunai paced outside the door to their room. She figured it had to be past midnight, hopefully he was asleep. But then again, what if he wasn't, she could never face him. She just wanted to get her bed rolls and sleep outside, but that was much easier said than done. With a brave deep breath she pushed open the door with full intent of walking through the door way. As she did however, she was stopped as a wall of dry stuffy heat met her in the doorframe. Candles were lit everywhere and she figured it was mostly Zuko's own body heat that created the wall. She couldn't conceal the tiny noise of surprise she made. There was a movement in the windowsill and she noticed him perched there, glaring at the window.

"Shouldn't you be with your boyfriend." The words dripped with bitterness and anger. Maybe he was jealous but she'd claimed to be his friend, she wouldn't give him the time of day. It's not as though he thought himself a prize, quite the opposite, but he at least deserved the decency of ignoring him, instead of toting him along like she cared. He felt like releasing all his pent up anger, using that deliciously applicable word "Slut" once more. However for some despicable reason he couldn't bring the words forth. He expected her to yell, scream, give him an opportunity to reciprocate. She did none of that. Instead she whimpered, let out a little ghost of a sob. He turned back just slightly to glance at her, finding her staring at the ground, her body quivering.

"W-we didn't do anything." she barely made out. He turned to face her completely, his expression just slightly skeptical. She raised her head just slightly and he could see the tears staining her cheeks, her eyes bloodshot, before she dropped it again.

"I... I just wanted to be friends. He was fun and we sparred-" _That explains the sweat..._ Zuko thought. He slowly started to realzize a few things. One, Toph had to die. Two, he let jealously or whatever it was get way out of hand. Three, something about that had touched a nerve that he never wanted to touch again.

"...and I shouldn't have been flirting with him like that and I-"

"Kunai stop." Zuko finally cut in, his body temperature dropping and significantly cooling the painfully warm room. Zuko dropped his head forward and sighed.

"Toph told me some stuff... I guess I took it the wrong way. I'm... I'm sorry." Kunai sniffed and looked at him, pawing shyly at her cheeks as she eyed him.

"So you didn't think-"

"No! Well... Yes but now I realize that I was wrong." Kunai sighed deep. Maybe it wasn't her behavior at all. Maybe it was just word play and pranks. The thought temporarily satisfied her regret and she nodded, a small smile stretching her lips.

"Its... It's ok." she whispered. Zuko nodded his head just a bit at her. He slid to his side of the bed, giving her a silent invitation to claim her end. As they lay together, Zuko made a silent promise to never let his emotions get the better of him again. It wasn't just his anger he needed to keep in check.

It was everything.

_**I'm so sorry**_

_**Really**_

_**I'm sorry.**_

_**This chapter took way longet than expected as the beginning part was such a pain to write. I'm so bad at writing canon, it's kind of sad. **_

_**It also sucks**_

_**Anyway, I just wanted to talk a bit about what to expect from this story.**_

_**1.**__**Goes away from canon. Yep, this is where stuff starts to change. It's not OOC I promise, they just do some different stuff so don't be too shocked**_

_** introduction of some new OCs. They all won't play too huge a roll in the story, one will but trust me, that's a tale for another time**_

_** breaking down of Kunai. I built her up, showed you who she is now I'm breaking her down, showing you why. **_

_** . You're all probably anxious to find out the crap these flashbacks are about. You will**_

_** … in the least traditional way possible**_

_** . They will be tasteful and nice but they will be here. Also, they will not happen to often, I learned my lesson**_

_** headcanoning. You'll understand**_

_**That's what to expect. Here's what I want from you, my loving awesome fans**_

_** my tumblr. My url is livingloving123**_

_** the word, spread the word, spread the word. Let's get this as big as Stormbenders or Midsummer Madness**_

_** , Oneshots are all welcome. Any of your observations and creativity are loved!**_

_** . Please suggest things you wanna see happen. The plot is set but I may give you a shoutout**_

_** . Tell me what you think**_

_** discussion questions. I don't put them here for my health**_

_**DISCUSSION QUESTIONS!**_

_**Why did Kunai cut herself?**_

_**Does Sokka have feelings for Kunai?**_

_**Will Kunai and Katara get along?**_

_**What do you think of Gorou?**_

_**What will happen next time?**_


	2. You're My Real Mama

**Welcome my friends. Important AN at the bottom, please read. **

**My Real Mama**

Zuko kept his vow. A distance grew between Kunai and Sokka, despite the friendly overtones of their relationship. Only then did Zuko begin to notice the differences in their spproach to sdapting with the group. He made sure to stay isolated when possible, only spoke when necessary, avoided conflict and in that regard, avoid Katara. Kunai took a different approach. She went on multiple exploring missions, practiced airbending with Aang on many occasions and engaged in some very un-ladylike activities with Toph. Yet, Zuko noticed, that Kunai kept her distance from Katara.

Kunai was sitting in an empty courtyard. She needed some time to relax and a bit of waterbending and self -pampering would help alleviate pent up stress. She undid her hair from the thick braid it had been in and let it fall over her shoulders in a sea of black. Smiling softly she brought a snake of water to it. Starting at the front of her hair she engulfed a lock separating it into three small strands before braiding it into a thin tight and glistening new braid. She moved the snake through her hair methodically until her whole head was covered in tiny braids, unaware of the ocean blue eyes watching her.

"How'd you learn to do that?" Katara stepped forward, standing awkwardly, embarrassed to reveal her observation. Kunai jumped slightly and turned to her, surprised Katara was actually talking to her.

"I... I always used waterbending to wash my hair and I just kinda figured it out playing around. It makes things a lot simpler."

Katara nodded, a small smile playing on her face. She had to admit she was impressed.

"That's really cool."

Kunai smiled in appreciation."Thanks. You're really good too."

"Thanks. I trained with Master Pakku in the Northern Water Tribe and then this woman named Hama." There was sadness in her voice when she mentioned the despicable old woman and Kunai couldn't help but inquire. Katara explained to Kunai what Hama had done and when the subject of blood bending came up, Kunai's interests were peaked.

"Bloodbending?! I didn't even know that was possible! That's... That's amazing!"

"No it's not! It's evil, to reach inside someone and take control of them." she stated firmly, still not deterring the older girl.

"But think what you could do with healing or in battle! Hama was crazy but come on! You could do so much good!" Kunai continued smiling, watching the gears turn in the young waterbenders head. She had to agree that yes, the healing capabilities were probably endless but suggesting anything other than that was ok… It was just wrong.

"That doesn't change the fact that-"

"Why can't you just take someone else's view into consideration? Or it just the fact it's me saying it!?" Kunai could feel herself slipping. She didn't care.

Katara scoffed.

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"That you've had a problem with me from day one!"

Katara rolled her eyes, laughing humorlessly.

"Are you surprised?! It's kinda hard to trust you when you've been all buddy-buddy with the prince of the Fire Nation!"

Kunai almost laughed. Almost.

"That's all? You still don't trust him after all this time?"

"It's only been a few weeks and no I don't! You don't know what he did to us! I heard you in the caves and you didn't know a thing!" Katara was screaming at the top of her lungs, weight falling off her shoulders as she let loose everything she'd been holding back. Just because everyone else was so happy to have him didn't mean she had to be. He'd put them through hell, nearly destroyed her village, chased them all over the world! His sister had almost killed Aang and it was his crazy evil family's fault they were even in this mess. He didn't deserve trust.

"He told me everything! I got taken prisoner by Azula and given to him as a homecoming present and I still managed to trust him." Kunai dropped her head in her hands, massaging her temples.

"Look . . . He's been through a lot, but he's changed." Her voice became tender and soft. Zuko didn't need to be spoken for but she also knew he would not be speaking for himself anytime soon. Katara sucked in her bottom lip, her facade fading as the older girl walked past her.

"I'm not saying you need to be his friend. Just give him a chance."

* * *

Slowly, but surely everyone began to notice a change in Katara's attitude. She didn't storm from the room when Zuko entered. She spoke politely when he addressed her. Her hatred turned to simple animosity and dulled to the point where she no longer felt the need to remind him that no, she did not trust him at every occasion. As for her and Kunai, the relationship between them began to grow into somewhat of a friendship. Though Katara didn't completely trust the older girl, the found they both had something to offer each other. Katara, despite having an older brother, was always the mother, the mature one in the group and it was refreshing to have someone she could go to for advice, someone who didn't depend on her. Kunai, on the other hand, was always the baby and with Katara, she felt like she really had something to offer.

* * *

Kunai woke up in the middle of the night to find she was very much alone in bed. She'd retired early, not really up to chatting over tea and had expected Zuko to return.

Feeling oddly suspicious, she stood up and stretched her back with a dull pop before walking down the halls silently into the courtyard. Hush voices murmured in the distance and her suspicions sharpened.

"The Boiling Rock is the highest security prison in the Fire Nation and you thought you could fly in on a giant bison unnoticed." Zuko was scoping.

"Ok fine, not my brightest idea. What do you have in mind genius?"

"We take my war balloon. It'll fit three easy." Kunai furrowed her brow. She suddenly gasped in realization. They were staging a breakout at the Boiling Rock no less. She stepped out of her hiding place.

"If you guys want to make it out alive, you'll need someone with experience."

Zuko and Sokka both jumped at her presence.

"You're not going with us. It's too dangerous." Zuko said, not overly surprised at her eavesdropping.

"And what do you mean _experience_?" Sokka asked incredulously.

"I helped a couple friends breakout about a year ago. I've got experience."

Zuko narrowed his eyes at her before sighing and dropping his head.

"Fine."

Sokka glared at him, squawking and sputtering angrily.

"This was only supposed to be me! What you wanna invite everyone else in the world too!?"

Zuko rolled his eyes.

"At least she can help us over the lake."

Sokka groaned and smacked his forehead, grumbling defeated as he stalked off to the war balloon. Kunai smiled apologetically at Zuko.

"You know I won't hold you back."

Zuko nodded with a sigh. "Yeah... I know."

* * *

"Shit! Shit! _Shit, _SHIT, shit!" Kunai's frantic whispers would have been comical if they weren't currently trying to maneuver their war balloon over a boiling lake. Kunai was bending a small wave beneath them of whatever water she could cool but it was becoming increasingly hard to keep the water below boiling point. As they approached the shore she bent the water away from them, lowering the water levels several feet just long enough for them to safely crash against the shore. Kunai stumbled out of the destroyed balloon and collapsed with a groan. The wave of water she'd pushed away rushed back to the shore, lapping over the war balloon and pulling it into the water.

"Our balloon!" Zuko exclaimed.

"It was broken anyway. Would you rather be boiling to death?" Kunai asked dryly .

Zuko sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Well what now?"

Sokka pursed his lips and tapped his chin thoughtfully.

"That's a good question..."

Zuko clenched his fists. "You mean you don't have a plan?!"

Sokka shrugged.

"Hey you're the one who said you didn't always have to think things through." Zuko smacked his forehead. Much to his surprise and slight annoyance, Kunai laughed.

"You guys are hopeless. It's simple. One of us goes in as a guard, finds your dad and gets the others. Then whoever's playing guard claims he's got orders to escort the prisoners to somewhere else and we're out!" The boys stared at her blankly, thinking over her plan for flaws.

"That... actually makes sense." Sokka said.

"I'll go in as the guard and-"

"No!" Zuko spoke up rather quickly, surprising himself.

"Kunai should go. They separate the female prisoners from the male and she'll have no backup. As a guard, no one will mess with her."

Kunai began to protest when she realized he was right. She was well aware of the risks associated with being a lone prisoner.

They worked out the last details of their plan as the scaled the cliff side up to the prison, pressed against the wall to avoid detection.

"I'll see you guys in three hours." Kunai whispered, a wicked grin on her face a she ran off from them.

"Hey Zuko?" Sokka whispered as the two snuck off.

"Yeah?"

"You _do_ realize she's not gonna die right."

Zuko turned, both glaring and blushing at the younger boy's knowing smirk.

"Shut up."

* * *

Zuko hated everything. They'd left Kunai to her own devices, expecting her to come back and retrieve them after three hours, Chief Hakoda already secured. Then it would be an easy trip to the gondola and they were out. Their plan was flawless and was should've been completed…

Yesterday.

It had been a full night since they'd seen Kunai and to top it all off, Zuko was stuck in this cell with Sokka who's been jabbering on none stop about his Dad.

So yeah, Zuko hated everything.

* * *

_I failed, _Kunai thought bitterly as she slumped on her knees, staring up at several angry guards through swollen eyes.

"Well well well. How the mighty have fallen." one guard teased, tipping her head back. She snapped at his finger and he laughed, giving her a firm smack and knocking her over.

"Can't believe the Great Dragon got right under our noses." one of the female guards laughed.

"Hey Chin, you want us to leave, maybe you can get your fill of her?"

The voices all began to blur together in her head, her bruised ribs and aching bruises clouding her thoughts.

"I wouldn't fuck this trash if my life depended on it."

"Come on man. Gotta admit she's cute."

"Yeah. But that doesn't change the fact she killed my brother."

That caught Kunai's attention; she spat out a mouthful of blood and a tooth that had been jarred loose the night before.

"You're brother...was Ching Ra?" she whispered. He growled and grabbed her up by the hair. She barely registered the pain in her dazed state

"What gives you the right to use that name?!"

Kunai simply smirked, sadness and anger muting the pain as she spoke out of pride.

"Your brother... killed mine. Slit his throat while looking into the eyes... of a thirteen-year-old girl. I wish I could say... it was me who killed him... but it wasn't."

He tossed her the ground hard.

"Everyone out!" he barked, working at his belt. "I think I will get my fair share of this one."

Kunai looked up at him through swollen eyes and terror shot through her. She scuffled back against the wall as the others left and he advanced on her. Tears formed in her eyes.

"Please... Please don't do this!" she begged, her whole body beginning to quake.

"You little slut..." As he crouched in front of her a loud shriek pierced the air. Old rusting metal scraped together throughout the prison. _Yard time _she thought in the deepest relief. The guard growled angrily before moving to the quivering girl, reluctantly unfastening her chains.

"We've still got business to take care of." His voice was dark, reminiscent of pain. Unlike that voice that voice that rang in her dreams, it lacked coldness and detachment. His anger was controlling him, not his own mind yet it terrified her all the same. With all the strength she could muster she pushed herself to her feet, rolling her bruised and bloody wrists. _I've got to find Zuko and Sokka, _she thought. She stumbled, barely catching herself on the second level railing. _Hell, they need to find me._

* * *

Their initial search for Kunai was fruitless. The two boys searched for hours. They examined every soldier to no avail. They asked everyone they met if they'd seen a dark skinned teenage girl with tattoos and every once in a while they mentioned Hakoda and still there was no sign of either. As the evening approached and time was beginning to wear thin they wondered what exactly had happened to her. Just as they were about to declare their resources exhausted, Sokka tapped Zuko on the shoulder.

"Zuko I-"

"Did you see her?"

"Yes but-"

Zuko grabbed the younger teen by the shoulders.

"Where is she?!"

"Zuko she's not-"

"You said you saw her!"

Sokka groaned and grabbed Zuko, shaking him hard. "I'm trying to tell you! Just shut up and look!" He pointed through the crowd where a small female figure lay slumped against a wall, her tattered prison grab hanging around her in bloody ribbons. Without a word, Zuko shot through the crowd, barreling through anyone who got in his way.

"Kunai!" he gasped as he approached her, Sokka trailing not far behind him. Both boys gasped when she looked up, revealing her bruised and beaten face. She smirked, almost sarcastically, revealing blood-coated teeth. Zuko rushed to her side, examining her all over while he let out a barrage of questions.

"Who did this? What happened? Where were you?"

She groaned out several protests yet he only responded when she raised her voice.

"You're burning me!"

He yanked his hands away to find his temperature had spiked out of control.

"Argh! I'm sorry! What happened!?" Kunai chuckled darkly.

"A few guard had a grudge against the Great Dragon." Her smiled dropped, the dark eyes of the guard who'd come so close... the eyes filled with hatred, burning like a coal in the back of her mind.

"Look I'm fine! Missing tooth, couple bruised ribs. Find me some water and some cover and I'll be fine."

Sokka nodded, running off to find some water.

"Kunai... are you sure you're ok?" His eyes were wide, his lips pulled back in a saddened grimace.

"We need to leave here today. There's a guard..."

Zuko narrowed his eyes and scowled. "What did he do to you?" he demanded in a low growl.

Kunai shook her head. "Nothing... yet. Zuko I-"

"Got it!" Sokka announced excitedly as he joined them, handing her a cup of water. Kunai smiled thankfully at him.

"Cover me ok?"

Sokka nodded and spread himself out in front of her. Zuko kept his eyes locked on her before sighing and coming to Sokka's side. Kunai brought the water around her hand, healing what she could and soothing what she couldn't.

"Ok. I'm good." Kunai said as she discarded the water, a bit more life in her voice. Sokka turned to her and smiled wide.

"I came up with a plan B. I figured something might go wrong. We still escape on the gondola but instead of going undercover we take a hostage!"

Zuko shook his head.

"Even if we get a hostage, the warden will just cut the line."

Sokka only smiled wider.

"Not if the hostage is the warden!"

Kunai began to nod slowly. "That… could actually work."

Zuko gave a small nod of agreement.

"Great! But we've only got 2 hours left out here so we've gotta hurry."

Kunai smiled and stood up, a small groan escaping her as the soreness lingered in her muscles.

"We'll split up and search the yard. Meet back here in an hour?" Sokka nodded, giving a brief thumbs up before running off through the yard. Zuko turned to Kunai, putting a hand firmly on her shoulder, gaining her full attention.

"Maybe we shouldn't split up."

Kunai sighed and lowered her head. She could admit to herself she was terrified of that guard seeking her out for revenge, but if he came too close to her, Zuko would undeniably do something stupid and get himself thrown in the cooler. She smiled weakly and placed her hand on his, gently running her thumb over his knuckles.

"I'm fine, Zuko." she whispered.

Zuko reluctantly nodded. "Kunai…" he started and though unable to find the words, she understood, giving him a reassuring smile as she disappeared into the crowd.

* * *

Kunai pushed herself through the crowd. An hour of searching and yet she hadn't come up with anything, not even a lead to where Hakoda might be. She was beginning to doubt if he was even in this prison. She sighed in relief, seeing Zuko and Sokka standing next to a tall man, obviously Water Tribe. As she drew closer, however, she noticed Sokka in an argument with someone, hidden amongst the crowd.

"No! For the last time I don't know anyone named Kunai! Why would I!? And even if I did I wouldn't tell you!"

Kunai wasn't surprised someone was looking for though she wasn't please either. However, when she saw who it was Sokka was talking to she froze completely, locking eyes with the women, the dark black hair, the crystalline blue eyes, the slight traces of graceful aging; all features of someone she believed to be dead.

"Sokka." Zuko rested a hand on Sokka's shoulder, ending his tirade and motioning to the locked gazes of the two women, the elder just as dumbstruck as she gazed at the tattooed girl.

"Kunai…" the woman breathed as if her voice would scare the girl away.

"Luna." Kunai spoke just as softly and with a whimper of emotion, ran into the older woman's arms. Luna held the young girl to her chest, cradling her like a child as she peppered soft kisses on her head, sobbing yet laughing in elated joy of their reunion. Kunai sobbed into her chest, forgetting the three men watching in both awe and confusion.

"My baby… oh my sweet baby. I've spent so long looking for you." Luna whispered as she tilted Kunai's head up, sweeping away a few tears with her thumb. Through her sobs, she chuckled softly.

"Oh just look at you… your father would have been so proud…. And your mother-"

Kunai shook her head at the hastily added latter statement, smiling sadly.

"Don't say that. Gorou explained everything to me when I was ten."

"So you know?" Luna asked, her eyes filled with the purity of a young mother's love. Kunai nodded and in a small voice, innocent as a young child.

"You're my real Momma."

**Hey guys. There are some things you need to know. **

**1: This Chapter is really important. There are things you need to remember, small details that will come up again. Foreshadowing, stuff like that. **

**2: Chaper 3 will come out very soon.**

**3: There is a song quote hidden in this chapter. This song, while not used in context, is a song that fits this story perfectly. These next couple chapters will have song quotes that may or may not be used in context. I'll probably put the artists or maybe the relationhip it describes in the ANs so read them please. **

**4: This Chapter was heavily betaed by the amazing Tonights The Night. Seriously, I didn't even need to show up! This chap would have sucked so bad it would had been deep throating. Odd analogy, I know. **

**This chapter's artist: Cocorosie. **


	3. Bad Days

**AN at the bottom **

**Artists of the Song Quotes in order of appearance**

**Cocorosie**

**Sia**

**Bad Days**

"_Sit down Sissy." Gorou waved the Kunai into his tent, sighing as he sat in front of her. _

"_I promised I would tell you everything when you turned ten so here it goes." His eyelids drifted shut. "Do you remember the girls?" _

_Kunai nodded slowly. "Of course I remember them," the young girl said, cocking her head to the side. Gorou sighed and rubbed his palm against his face. _

"_Well the girls… the girls were dad's concubines. That means he used them for uh… well you know where babies come from right?" he asked, scowling at her amused smile. _

"_You mean sex?" _

"_You just love making stuff hard for me, don't ya?"_

"_Yep." _

_Gorou rolled his eyes. "Any way. They moved in shortly after I was born when Mom and Dad's marriage really broke apart. Everything was working until 6 years later when Luna got pregnant." _

_Kunai furrowed her brow in confusion. Slowly her features began to sink in realization and shock. _

"_You mean…"_

"_You're half Water Tribe. Mom threatened to kick Luna out on the streets if she didn't give you up. They wanted to keep up appearance for Dad's political career." Gorou winced at his own words though he knew brutal honesty was the only way for her to really understand. Kunai pulled her legs to her chest, tears forming behind her violet eyes. _

"_Mama… never really loved me, did she?" she whispered, tears dripping down the baby fat lined apples of her cheeks. Gorou sighed and went to embrace her, wrapping his arms around her tiny frame and cradling her against his chest._

"_But they didn't love me either. Think about it. Not only was I Anti-Firenation, I was the bastard that broke up the marriage." He chuckled lightheartedly. _

"_You're not making me feel any better," Kunai grumbled into his chest. Gorou sighed and pulled her closer._

"_What I'm trying to say is even if they didn't care, that doesn't matter. What matters is that we've got each other. And besides, Luna loved you, with all her heart." She buried her head into his chest, his shirt slowly saturating. Gorou let her sob quietly in his arms for a few more moments before she calmed enough to speak. _

"_Luna gave me up even though I was her baby. She was really brave."_

* * *

Luna smiled, still crying as rained kisses upon her daughters head. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you too Mama." Kunai pulled away, finally remembering the task at hand. She sniffed and wiped her eyes with the inside of her elbow, turning to face the three men.

"Guys this is my mom, Luna. Mom this is Sokka and his dad Chief Hakoda. And _this_ is Zuko." The three gave small waves.

"Zuko, she's coming with us." Kunai stated strongly.

Zuko nodded. "Fine but we need to hurry." Sokka turned to Hakoda with a bright smile.

They headed towards the far guard tower, the area just below it abandoned and a blind spot. Hidden from the guards and far from the other prisoners, the three began to discuss their plan.

"So what's your plan, Sokka?" Hakoda asked.

Sokka opened his mouth then closed it quickly, averting his eyes from the expecting group.

"Yeah… thing about that is…"

"You don't have a plan do you?" Kunai asked flatly, shaking her head. Zuko groaned and smacked his forehead.

"Well you should start thinking of something before-"

"Sokka!"

Zuko was cut off by a bright feminine voice. Sokka turned around to see a vibrant red head bounding towards him.

"Suki!" He caught the young woman in his arms spinning her around excitedly. Zuko, scoffed.

"Sokka! We don't have any time!" he barked, pulling the two lovebirds out of their dazed state.

"Suki's a warrior-she can help!" he shot back and quickly explained to her the plan. Suki pondered it for a moment. Slowly, she nodded, her lips curling up at the corners.

"I think I can handle the warden." Suki ran off into an alleyway right underneath the where the warden was standing. She jumped from wall to wall in silent bounds until she reached the ledge of the balcony, eyeing the inattentive warden thoughtfully. She flipped over the railing, flying over the warden's head. As she did, she grabbed the tie from his topknot, effectively gagging him before he had time to protest. The other guards, now aware of her presence, unsurely considered their advance as she wrapped an arm around his neck and bound his hands. When the rest of them reached the balcony to find their target already bound, Kunai smirked.

"I like her," she remarked. Hakoda ran up next to them. With a laugh he slapped a hand over his son's shoulder.

"Good choice son."

The six of them, not counting the hostage, headed slowly to the gondola, shooting warning glances at every guard they passed so everyone knew the warden was in peril. They unceremoniously tossed the man into the gondola, filing in quickly. Zuko stayed back, making quick work of destroying the controls so no one could stop them. He took a few steps back and ran forward, launching himself at the Gondola. Sokka barely caught his arm before he fell. Sokka hauled him through the window and to safety, giving him a small pat on the back. He noticed Kunai, though smirking confidently, was as pale as a dove-rats feathers"

This isn't a suicide mission," she mumbled. He smiled back and was about to sit next to her when there was a deep thud and a gentle tap on the roof of the gondola.

"Oh Zuzu, you make it too easy."

The four teens all looked at each other, the cold, taunting voice known to them. With haste they climbed to the top of the Gondola, Azula and Ty-Lee smiling at them. At the same time, the warden slipped past Luna and Hakoda, spitting out the loose gag.

"CUT THE LINE!" he as Hakoda tried to restrain him. Azula scowled.

"MAI!" she yelled to a dark figure at the platform. The young woman turned around, first locking eyes with her leader, then her ex-boyfriend. She turned away from him and went to work, a barrage of stilettoes knocking the saw wielding men back. There was no time to admire her skill as Ty Lee went to face Suki hand to hand and Azula wielded a perfectly aimed fireball between Kunai and the two boys, purposefully separating them. Zuko redirected the fireball, sending it back towards her. Demonstrating her flexibility, Azula flattened against the gondola, leg splaying across the metal and sending an arc of flame at Kunai and knocking her off balance on the already rocking Gondola. As she stumbled back, her foot just missed the edge. Zuko reached for her. Before he could catch her, Azula's hand shot out and grabbed her wrist, bringing her over the edge of the gondola, just above the boiling lake. The boys stilled, looking at each other for answers.

Azula smirked and turned her attention back to Kunai, bringing her lips just shy of the older girl's ear. No one but Kunai heard what she whispered but they all saw the effect. Darkness rose in Kunai's widening eyes and suddenly she roared fire leaping from her mouth to just barely lick the Princess's armored arm. Azula darted back and released her.

Kunai flipped back onto the gondola, fireball in hand and sent a barrage of fearsome attacks on the surprised princess, all agility, style and finesse absent from her movement. She aimed for the throat, the heart, each attack growing closer to its target. Azula held her own, raising a wall of fire in front of her to block the barrage. To her surprise a fist shot through the wall and grabbed her by the throat, cutting off her oxygen.

"You… will never…touch her." Kunai growled before flicking her wrist and knocking the princess off the edge to her imminent death. Zuko rushed to the edge of the gondola but instead of watching his little sister fall, he saw Azula hanging from the parallel wire. Ty Lee followed suit, hoping off in mid battle to stand on the parallel wire with a smile. Zuko closed his eyes.

_Azula always wins. Even when she loses she wins. _

The exhausted warriors made their way back to the gondola and rode peacefully to the end of the track. Leaving the warden, they ran off to where Azula's airship was hidden behind the rock face. They easily blew through the few remaining crew members and hijacked the air ship and at last, at least for a short time, they were safe.

* * *

Fatigued as they were, Zuko decided to park them in the concave of a deep valley, effectively hiding them from any passerby. Once they were settled, Kunai and Luna wandered off to a remote rock overseeing the cliff-side.

"How'd you end up in the boiling rock anyway?"

Luna chuckled. "I'm still a Fire Nation citizen. I spoke against the war and was sent with another shipment of prisoners for simplicity's sake." Luna chuckled once more but it soon faded as a serious air came about her. "Your friends are worried about you."

Kunai looked up at her, frowning slightly. Luna sighed deeply and answered her puzzled expression.

"They told me you'd had issues with depression before and-"

"How much did they tell you?" Kunai tried to portray a demand but her voice came out desperate and broken.

"Everything," Luna breathed. She cupped her daughter's cheek, a glaze of deep sympathy softening her face. "I'm so sorry sweetheart."

A strangled sigh escaped through Kunai's throat. She dropped her head as Luna gathered her in her arms.

"I'm turning seventeen in a few days… I promised her I'd come back by the time I was seventeen," she whispered, her voice muffled in her mother's chest.

"I'm with the Avatar now and I can't just leave but…"

"But you love her more than anything and you have an obligation," Luna finished. Kunai sighed deeply and Luna held her out to arm's length, looking her in the eye.

"Don't ever feel ashamed. It wasn't your fault and you did what you had to."

Kunai looked down and sniffed, pawing at her eyes. "She'll hate me. It _was_ my fault and I didn't own up to my responsibilities!" she cried. Luna held the young woman tight, rocking her back and forth and whispering quiet soothing nonsense. Kunai sniffed as she composed herself.

"They don't know anything."

"Does Zuko know?" Kunai looked up with wide shocked eyes.

"I could never tell him. He'd hate me." Her voice broke slightly and a lump began to grow in her throat. "I've never felt like this before." she admitted, pulling her knees to her chest.

"I know he cares about me but I couldn't drag him into this."

Luna smiled softly. "I believe that if he really cares for you, he'll look past that. You were just a child when it happened, Kunai."

Kunai sniffed and wiped her eyes roughly.

"Thirteen isn't a child," she murmured.

"I think the important thing is how you feel about him."

Kunai chuckled humorlessly. "I really like him. I love everything about him and I don't wanna lose him."

"Kunai."

Kunai froze at the masculine voice. She turned slowly, to see the young man leaning against a tree, his dark black hair draping over his face and obscuring his expression. He looked up at her, his amber eyes locking on hers.

"I'll be over there if you wanna talk," he murmured and walked off into the woods. Kunai was unable to speak, shocked and embarrassed.

"Go to him," Luna whispered giving her daughter one last kiss on the head before walking back down the path to camp. Kunai dropped her head in her hands. She wanted to run as far away from here as possible, avoid ever having to face up to the words that just left her mouth yet she found herself walking the path he had followed into the woods.

"Zuko?" she called.

"Over here." He was sitting at the edge of a small pond, his feet skimming the surface. Kunai sucked in a breath and sat next to him.

"Zuko…" she started but no words could come. She could lie and say she didn't mean it, effectively ending their friendship but hey, that was another bridge she had to burn eventually. The only other option was confess, tell him how she felt, tell him how she was terrified and angry at herself and head over heels.

"All I want is an answer. Do you want to be with me or not?" His tone was soft and vulnerable, the question a sincere as he could muster. Kunai bit her lip.

"I can't answer that," she whispered honestly. Zuko grit his teeth and turned to her sharply, glaring.

"Why not!? If you like me then why can't we be together! Tell me what exactly it is about me that-"

"Stop!" She grabbed his forearm, her eyes fierce. "This isn't about you." She said sternly. "You… you deserve better."

Zuko narrowed his eyes as her grip loosened and she dropped her arm. She gulped past the lump once again forming in her throat and was about to stand when he stopped her, cupping her tenderly. She turned back around to him, and Zuko couldn't help but hate the look in her eyes. She looked defeated, broken, like she honestly believed he was the prize and she was the failure. Timidly, he stroked her cheek, reveling in her sharp intake of breath. Silently, he pulled her close until her breath was tickling his lips, just inches away from hers.

"Let me decide that." Slowly he moved closer and closer until the gap between them was closed. She fisted one hand in his tunic, the other tangling in his hair and pulled him closer. His hands wound around her small waist, holding her to him, as if she might drift away. They pulled away at the same time, pressing their foreheads together as they caught their breath.

"I've never done this before," Kunai whispered self-consciously. Zuko smiled small, tenderly brushing a stand of hair behind her ear.

"You've never had a boyfriend before?"

Kunai shook her head with a shrug, a light blush falling across her cheeks. Agni, how he loved that. He pulled her close, letting her head rest upon his chest.

"You really think you can deal with me?" she said in a self-deprecating comic tone. He chuckled not knowing how serious a question it was.

"Of course." Kunai wanted to believe him. However, the rational part of her said otherwise; he had no idea who she really was, what he had taken on.

* * *

Zuko was having a lovely dream when he was thrown out of his bed onto the cold and unforgiving floor, the six different Kunai's ripped away from him as reality kicked in. Kunai was leaned over the bed, staring out the window.

"Thank Agni…" she whispered to herself, just out of Zuko's earshot before running to grab her things, stepping over the dazed boy on the floor.

"It's Azula," she stated darkly.

He jumped to his feet, shaking the last bits of sleep and running out to the courtyard. "Damn it!" he cried at nothing in particular. He turned to Kunai.

"I'm going to take her. You guys get out of here." Kuna grabbed his arm to stop him but the determination glinted in his eyes and she knew it was no use.

"Fine."

Zuko took her by surprise and gave her a brief peck on the lips before taking off onto the war balloon. The others were already going to work. Toph formed a deep tunnel in the rock face.

"We can escape through here! Hurry up!" she said. The others followed after her into the cavern until Aang came through with Appa who stopped just short of the mouth of the cave, bellowing deeply.

"I can't get him to go in!" Aang said dejectedly, dropping the reigns.

"You kids need to escape on Appa. I'll take care of the others."

Katara whirled around at the sound of her father's voice.

"No! The Fire Nation isn't going to separate our family again!" she said adamantly.

Hakoda pulled his daughter in for a hug. "We'll be fine."

Kunai looked to Luna. Luna smiled back. "It's ok. I promise we'll see each other again." The two shared an embrace, cut short by another well aimed blast of blue fire to the temple.

"Go!" Hakoda yelled. They all gave hasty waves as the splinter group mounted Appa. Toph formed a shield of stone around him as he flew off, blocking the blasts that came their way. Just as they approached safety, Kunai caught something in the corner of her eye. It was Zuko, hurtling through the canyon. A pathetic squeak just barely escaped her throat as she watched him plummet through the sky. Appa banked beneath the ships, just barely sweeping under him. Kunai grabbed his arm and pulled him to safety. Before he had time to fully comprehend what had happened she'd pulled him into her arms.

"You're ok," she whispered, more to herself than anyone. He sighed deeply and hugged her back. He felt her tremble slightly. She'd lost too much in her life to lose him now. Damnit, she just got him. He placed a small kiss on her head.

"Yeah…. Yeah I'm ok." he whispered. She pulled away from him, head down. He gripped her chin and tipped her head back, giving her a weak smile. They shared a silent moment, his gaze saying that no, you can't get rid of me that easy. She smiled back and slid her hand to his, interlacing their fingers.

Yeah, he'd be ok.

* * *

They traveled rather leisurely for the next three days, the lack of rush refreshing after the last few months. Toph complained about the ridiculous couple-ness of the group, Aang and Sokka were up to their usual antics, Katara scolded, Suki laughed, Zuko was still the quiet one though he began to open up as he was their most recent hero. However, with her seventeenth birthday only three days away, something happened to Kunai. She wasn't expecting it. She awoke one morning to start off their travels and it hit her the moment she opened her eyes. Her body wouldn't cooperate. She had such little will to move that it took a good fifteen minutes of staring off into space to actually sit up. When Aang gave an excited good morning, a reply stuck in her throat, dissipating until it came out as barely a breath of a whisper.

She was having a Bad Day.

Bad Days were different for her then they were for other people. 'Bad Day' was a whisper amongst her friends, a widely understood warming of the monster that lurked inside of her. Once they were up in the air, everyone but her itching with anticipation of Ember Island, she looked them over. They didn't know what was going on, they had no idea. If they knew they'd be hiding her knives, they'd be sporting big fake smiles, trying to force conversation out of her instead of leaving her to the devices of her own mind. They would be forcing bowls of food at her, demanding she eat something instead of accepting her excuses: 'Oh I just don't feel well.' They had no idea what was going on with her.

With the exception of Zuko.

He had this way of seeing right through her, knowing something was wrong even if he had no idea why and he was using that skill to effectively piss her off the entire trip.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah."

"You're lying."

"No."

"Then why are you acting so weird."

She said nothing, turning away and curling in on herself. She knew he was probably mad at her now and that added to the weight on her throat, holding back everything she could ever want to say. There were only three things she wanted to do. The first was to sleep, to drift into a land of dreams where nothing was real, where nothing could hurt her. The second was to train until her muscles turned to jelly. The third…

She fingered the knife on her bag, cold steel sharpened to deadly point. She wasn't completely surprised the urge had come up again, just disappointed.

Ember Island came into view none too soon. Appa swooped in low, letting out a groan of relief as he collapsed onto his belly in the courtyard of the large house.

"Wow! It's so beautiful." Suki gushed, hopping down and turning in circles to take it all in.

Sokka nodded feigning indifference. "Meh. It's ok."

Toph hopped down as hard as possible, making sand fly everywhere. "I must admit Sparky this place is pretty sweet."

Katara pursed her lips in conflict. "I dunno… are you sure it's safe to be hiding from the Fire Nation in the Fire Lord's house?"

Aang smiled wide, jumping down in front of her. "Don't worry Katara! This place is totally secluded!"

Zuko nodded. "I've been here many times before. No one just stumbles across this place. Besides, no one's been here since our family was actually happy. " e grumbled.

"Hey Kunai, could you give me my bag." He looked over at the young woman, leaning against Appa with her head down. Without meeting his eyes she retrieved the bag and tossed it to him.

"We should find rooms." She winced inwardly at her voice, an odd weak whisper, and the words fake and empty. She was transparent. She'd always been transparent. They all nodded and went inside, ignoring her pathetic state. She shut out their gushing, making her way down the far halls until their voices were barely audible and found a room. It was dark, the window cracked. Perfect. She dispersed the dust with a gust of wind. It was primal and unskilled. She was a terrible airbender, she knew that so why did thinking of it now hurt like this _now_?

She ignored the feeling, knowing all that pain was about to be dealt with. She locked the door and sat on the bed, retrieving her knife. It looked sinister as the meager light reflected off it. She rolled up her loose pant leg. In the little light she could just barely make out the morbid form of poetry that had scarred upon her leg. Slut. Whore. Ugly. Along with other meaningless lines scattered carved into the flesh of her leg, always avoiding the bright red dragon across her thigh.

She thought about the friend she'd lied to, the innocent life just barely beginning to be lived that she'd betrayed, the man she was leading on just like the slut she was.

The knife pressed into her skin, dragging smoothly through her flesh. As she sliced more and more skin, crimson fluid dripped down her leg and coated her fingers. Her cuts became frantic, growing deeper and deeper, the pain growing more and more intense. When her arm began to ache from the repetitive movement she pulled the knife way and examined the damage. Tiny drops of blood were finding their way to the floor. Her leg was saturated, her fingers stained. The scene was gruesome. She felt truly alive. Kunai tilted her head back, reveling in the pain.

She deserved the pain, the blood.

She didn't deserve Zuko.

She didn't deserve Kameko.

**Well here are some very important points of this story. You should really read this as I don't want there to be confusion. **

**This is not a healthy relationship. I understand that, don't send me flames. **

**You may find the suddenness of her depression off but from my own experience, this is what it's like. **

**There are 2 song quotes by two different artists. One in a quote from the same song as last chapter. **

**Artist that appears first: Cocorosie**

**Artists that appears second: Sia**

**Like I said, these quotes aren't in context, however they do apply to the story more and more as you learn more and more about Kunai. **

**Chapter 4 is finalized but I kinda wanted to make you sweat. Also, chapter five is very important so start remembering things. The flashbacks, the small details are all leading to the truth about kunai. A new OC will be introduced also, I think you're gonna really like this one. **

**Review please**

**Follow me on tumblr livingloving123. Ask Kunai questions if you'd like, she'll gladly answer. I'll also post oneshots and chapter updates. **


	4. Different Time, Same Place

_**Welcome back for a new chapter**_

_**Different Time, Same Place**_

"More ferocious!" Zuko barked at his pupil. "I wanna hear you roar!"

Aang released pent up stress and frustration, fire shooting from his mouth and hands. He looked to his teacher and beamed when he got a very rare nod of approval. Aang sighed in relief, and collapsed over the stairs.

"Am I done now?" he asked.

Zuko rolled his eyes and grumbled an affirmative, sitting next to Kunai. It had been an ok day, four or five on a scale to ten. She could actually sit amongst other human beings without losing her mind but she still kept one hand clasped over her leg subconsciously, the new scars still tight and painful and burned into her memory.

"You know what sounds good right now?" Sokka inquired. He jumped up, ripping his clothes off in the process. "Beach party!"

The others all cheered in agreement, jumping up and running toward the shore. Kunai cracked a small smile though stayed where she was, not considering the idea of a swimsuit or playing around like a child.

"There's only 2 weeks before the comet and they're all playing around!" Zuko muttered in frustration. During his previous encounters with the group, they were all fierce warriors, no matter how inexperienced. Now, being a part of them, he realized that for everything they were, they were still a bunch of kids.

"It's just one day," Kunai said softly, not quite meeting his eyes. Zuko frowned. Her recent passivity and overall changes in demeanor were more than unsettling. He hadn't questioned it, not wanting to push it. However, he couldn't help but dwell on the fact that her recent depression was only days apart from their kiss.

"They still act like they have no idea how serious this is! This is why I had second thoughts!" He regretted the words the moment they came out of his mouth. He clenched his jaw and stiffened. He'd thought about it privately but never dared think of voicing it. He'd sworn his loyalty to this group and to even think of betraying them was a horrible dishonor. To his surprise, when Kunai looked up at him there was softness in her eyes, a sympathy that was genuine.

"You had second thoughts?"

Zuko gulped and looked down, awkwardly picking invisible lint off his pants. Was her kindness a setup? Was she opening him up just to cut him down? Her hand wrapped around his neck, massaging the back of his head.

"I… I sometimes thought about how easy it would be to take them to my father. I could play it off as some scheme, like I'd planned everything out like Azula." He knew she heard the resentment in his voice as she scooted over, pressing her leg against his and tilting his head to look at her.

"I could go home again. Be a hero, a mastermind." He chuckled darkly, shaking his head at his own stupidity. Wordlessly, she wrapped her arm around his shoulder. He relaxed into her touch, resting his head on hers. He'd never been touched like she touched him.

Katara, from behind a pillar in the courtyard, grit her teeth and clenched her fists, the picnic basket she'd gone to retrieve long forgotten.

"But he'd never believe that. He knows I'm not as smart as her." Zuko mumbled into her hair. "I hate myself for ever considering that."

Katara loosened her jaw slightly. _At least he knows how wrong he is._

"You shouldn't." Kunai said. "The point is that you didn't do it. You wanted you father's approval, anyone could understand that." Katara strained to hear her whisper.

"You're a good man. It's ok to have second thoughts."

Katara stewed behind the pillar, anger bubbling deep inside her. She wasn't even as angry at . She was angry that Kunai thought it was ok. She probably would have skipped back to Firelord Ozai at his side. Kunai, her friend, was a willing accomplice of everything Zuko had done since the crystal catacombs. Kunai, her friend, who was supposed to have her back, was sitting here saying that anything he did was just fine. Kunai, her friend, love struck and naïve.

Squelching her emotions, Katara rejoined the group at the beach, putting on a brave smile and saying that she simply could not find the basket. They were in no immediate danger; there was no use to confront her yet.

But there would be a confrontation soon enough.

The next day came and Zuko surprised the group by postponing Aang's training to go into town with Sokka and Suki. His reasons included having to get stuff, things, something, and none of your business. The three left early in the morning and returned in the afternoon, Zuko looking particularly annoyed.

"Guys! Guess what!? There's a play about us!" Sokka announced, holding up an ornate poster.

"I'm telling you it's no good guys; they messed up _Love Amongst the Dragon_ four years in a row," Zuko grumbled, setting his back on the edge of the fountain as he sat down. Toph slid in next to him.

"What's in the bag Sparky?" She reached out to grab it. He snatched the small paper bag away, holding it above his head.

"Nothing that concerns you."

Toph shrugged. "I'll find out soon enough," she said confidently.

"So when's this little play?"

"Tonight. We can all go out together, make a night of it." Suki suggested, smiling excitedly. Zuko mumbled something reminiscent of 'we don't have time for this' but nodded noncommittally.

They left later that night, everyone teeming with excitement. Zuko was his usual self though he was looking forward to seeing what this was all about. Kunai was quiet as she had been though she was talking and joking a little more, this day not bringing any reminders of her birthday tomorrow. Katara was a bit reserved, a bad mood barely being held in that would engulf everyone if the floodgates were opened.

On the way to the theater, Kunai noticed a shadowy figure standing in an alley. At first, she didn't think much of it until she saw another man walk by, quickly exchanging a few coins for a small bag of rolled papers. She watched him intently, falling behind the rest of the group. Zuko turned around to her, motioning for her to follow. Kunai bit her lip and waved him on.

"I'll catch up," she called. When they were far enough ahead, she slipped into the alley, staring off and leaning against the wall next to the shady figure.

"Do you sell straight weed?" she murmured, holding out a handful coins. The man quickly swiped the money from her hand and replaced them with a joint.

"Not enough for a bag, sweetheart."

Kunai rolled the joint between her fingers and nodded.

"This… this is fine." She briskly left the alleyway and began walking slowly towards the theater, lighting the tip of the joint and bringing it between her lips. She sucked in a deep breath, smoke filling her lungs. Her nerves tingled, her eyes glazed over and she felt indescribably peaceful. It had been years since she'd indulged and if she'd ever needed a release, now was it.

By the time she reached the theater she'd smoked half the joint and put the rest in her pocket Kunai. She floated into the top box, sliding in next to Zuko.

"Where were you?" he asked, draping an arm around her. Kunai pursed her lips.

"I uh… I got an apple," she said seriously.

"An apple?"

"Apple."

He began to question her but the lights dropped and the music started, cutting him off. Quickly disinterested in what was turning out to be an awful play, Zuko looked down at Kunai who was leaning on his shoulder, tracing his finger on his chest. She looked up at him and smiled devilishly. He smirked back and leaned down, capturing her lips in a passionate kiss. He ran his hands through her dark tresses, pulling her close and rubbing his hand up and down her thigh. He pulled his lips away. Kunai let out a whimper of disapproval until he moved to the nape of her neck, pressing soft, tickling kisses across the taut skin.

"Z-Zuko that tickles!" she giggled, playfully shoving him away. He smiled wickedly before dipping down once, more kissing her with passion and playfulness, smiling against her lips. They stayed locked together, every once in a while pulling away with a giggle and a breath until there was a distinct cry from the stage.

"I must capture the Avatar to regain my HONOR!"

Kunai pulled away from him abruptly, leaning over the seat to stare in amused shock at the actor that was supposed to be him.

"That's hilarious!" she chocked, falling into a fit of giggles. Zuko scowled and crossed his arms.

"No it's not."

Kunai pouted and snuggled into his chest, staring up at him wide eyed with a dramatic pout. Zuko rolled his eyes but put an arm around her, pulling her close as they watched the first act play out.

* * *

"That was terrible! I'm not a woman!" Aang cried as they sat around the back entrance of the theater, lamenting on the train wreck that ensued.

"They make me seem stiff and humorless." Zuko looked around for some support, only to find empty stares. He turned to Kunai. "I'm not like that right?"

Kunai simply smiled and kissed him on the head. "You gotta admit it's pretty funny." she said.

"Yeah, that's only because you haven't showed up yet." Sokka grumbled.

"Well when I do show up it's gonna be awesome and… that's such a weird word. Awe-ssssss-uuuuu-mmmm. Awesome. Awesomeawesomeawesomeawesome awesome. It doesn't even sound like a word anymore." She looked up with a smile, meeting blank stares.

"You ok Sweet Cheeks?" Toph asked, mentally noting Sweet Cheeks wasn't the one and to find a name that clicked.

"Yeah you seem… off." Zuko said. He looked over at her, noting the her eyes were red and glazed. Kunai shook her head.

"I'm fine. I've never been better." She chirped, rocking up on her toes. Sokka stood up with a deep sigh.

"Well, this intermission's almost over. You guys ready for the rest of this… thing."

The others replied with grumbles and sarcastic comments as they filed back into the balcony box to watch the rest of the production.

* * *

"Let's go Toph! It's earthbending time!" Aang's actor/actress chirped floating off on her tiny glider contraption as the rest of the characters ran off stage. On came 'Zuko' dramatically flipping his hair with every step. Suddenly a tiny girl with dragons painted on her body, dressed in a purple bra and tight sparkly leggings cartwheeled across the stage and onto 'Zuko', wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I know that's you Prince Zuko. You can't fool-"the actress did some sort of spastic movement and threw multi-colored ribbons that were supposed to represent her bending in every direction. "The Great Dragon!" The girl winked and cocked her hip, letting out a sickeningly sweet giggle. Kunai stared, pale faced at the stage.

"That…can't be…"

"Stick with me baby! I may be bad, but I'll change for you!" Zuko rolled his eyes at the actor's proclamation and looked over at Kunai, a worrisome scowl crossing his face. Kunai whimpered as her actress jumped up and wrapped her legs around 'Zuko's' waist.

"You think you can handle the most powerful bender in the universe?" the actress purred, licking her lips.

"I know I can." 'Zuko' said dramatically. The actress then giggled like a child and flipped out of his arms and off stage. The curtain dropped, signaling the end of the scene. Katara turned back to say something clever but her words were cut short when she saw Kunai's petrified stare, deeper than embarrassment or anger. Zuko rested his hand on her knee cap, grabbing her attention and giving her a small, reassuring glance. Kunai sighed and leaned back, massaging her temples. She wasn't like that. No, she wasn't anything like that.

* * *

"Choose treachery. It's more fun!" 'Iroh' said, sipping tea with a smile. Kunai clung to his side and began rubbing his face and hair in what was meant to be affection.

"Baby…" Deep dramatic breath.

"Please…" Deep dramatic breath.

"Don't.." Deep dramatic breath.

"_LEAVE ME_!" she finished the proclamation in an unnaturally deep 'sultry' voice. 'Zuko', wearing the same scowl he'd worn the entire play, wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Come with me baby! We'll be unstoppable!" 'Kunai' giggled and proceeded to shove Iroh over and skip off stage with Azula and Zuko as the music roared dramatically and the lights rose, signaling the next intermission. Kunai shot up, running out of the theater and to the outer balcony. She choked on her sobs, trying and failing to withhold her tears as she doubled over the balcony. Kunai pulled the bud from her pocket, lighting it and taking a deep drag, trying to numb herself. Even as she felt it take over her body, she wanted more. She wanted the stuff her friends grew, the stuff that made her see rainbows and took her away from reality for hours. However, she didn't have stronger stuff and she was still here in reality where a complete stranger thought she was nothing but a whore. She had to wonder, what did the others think of her? What did Zuko think?

There was movement behind her and she cupped her hands around the blunt.

"Zuko I don't-"

"It's not Zuko." Katara said sharply. Kunai sighed deeply and laid her head on the banister.

"I don't want to talk, Katara."

"Then listen." Katara stalked forward until she was just behind the older girl.

"You shouldn't be upset. What you see up there is true. This whole time you've just been doing everything to please Zuko! I _heard_ you two talking! You said it was ok for him to want to take us back to the Fire Lord! You don't care about anything other than making your precious fire prince happy!"

To Katara's surprise, Kunai began to chuckle, an unsettling self-deprecating laugh that grew louder and louder.

"You think all I want to do is please huh?" she asked, looking barely over her shoulder at the younger girl. Katara was caught off guard for a moment but quickly composed herself, nodding.

"Yes, that's exactly what I think," she said proudly, sticking her nose in the air. Kunai chuckled one more and sat up wiping the residual tears off her face.

"Old news Katara. If you think you're the only one who thinks that about me…" Kunai turned around, a dangerous glint in her eyes. She shook her head with a smirk.

"Old. News." Kunai pulled the blunt out. Katara gasped. Kunai took a deep drag and blew out puffs of white smoke into Katara's face. The younger girl jumped back, yelping.

"What _is_ that!?"

Kunai simply laughed and sauntered past her. She thought that she should thank Katara later.

That was just the confirmation she needed.

"_Ren, tell it to me straight, what do you think about this whole Kunai mess," inquired an aging man named Po. He sat with his friend in a bar, enjoying a relaxing break from the travel of the Dragons. Ren laughed deeply. _

"_Tell you how I see it. We all know she was drunk. Saw her take three, four hits off the pipe and you know how tiny she is. So little missy gets away from her little friends, gets a little frisky and Crico scoops in for a taste. Wakes up feeling like a slut, makes a big deal out of the whole thing." _

_Po shrugged slightly. "I dunno and I mean, think about it, she's what, thirteen? She's just a kid and Crico doesn't role like that." _

_Ren laughed, shaking his head. "Any piece of ass that fine ain't a kid in my book." _

The rest of the play was a blur. Kunai spent most of it trapped within the confines of her own mind, the cycle of her thoughts growing darker and darker, dulled only slightly by the drug fading from her system. She lagged behind the group, their irritated complaints just a buzz in her ear. When they reached the house she sighed in relief. She felt a tug on her hand. She turned to see Zuko, his golden eyes glinting beneath the shade of his hood, a devilish smirk playing on his features. The play had left him tense so naturally, he was drawn to his most recent form of stress relief. He was stressed, he was horny.

He pulled her along silently, adrenaline pumping through his veins in familiar expectation. He pulled her into his room and slammed the door. In one swift movement he pressed her against the wall and captured her lips, hooking her leg on his hip. He kissed a line down her throat, nipping and sucking the taught skin of her neck. He could just barely make out his name in her soft breathy moans. She wanted him. The way her hips writhed against his steadily growing need, the way her fingers dug into his shoulder. _She wants me so bad, _he thought as he wrapped his fingers slightly around her neck to tilt her head back in hopes to gain more access to that beautiful smooth skin.

He couldn't quite recall what happened next, but the moment after that he was sprawled out on the floor, an excruciating ache thumping through his jaw. He looked up just as the shadow of her figure disappeared through the doorway. Zuko groaned and smacked his forehead. He thought about going after her but he knew she wouldn't want to talk to him. His libido dead and the adrenaline wearing away he found himself exhausted. He draped an arm over his eyes and sighed deeply. Sleep now. Kunai tomorrow.

The moment the door closed behind her, Kunai collapsed to the floor sobbing. She drew her knees to her chest, rocking back and forth as she sucked in choked breath after choked breath, not even trying to calm the palpitations that racked her chest. She raised her fingers to her neck, the ghost of his hands still tingling in her nerves, mixed with the memory over another's hands. She wanted to cut again, punish herself for her stupidity. What did she think his intentions were, pulling her into his room late at night with that smile he damn well knew drove her insane? However, there was one thing that was tormenting her more than anything.

She had said no.

Terrified, overtaken by sensation and warmth, her pleas had only come out as whispers, nonsensical strings of words and have phrases meant to ward him off that he'd ultimately ignored because she couldn't have appeared more willing had she stripped off all her clothes and spread her legs. Zuko was, of course, a man, a prince who could have (and did have) any woman he wanted. Yet, Kunai couldn't give that to him. She couldn't surrender herself to his feel his touch; it was someone else's hands she felt when he touched her. She couldn't please him, no matter what he thought her purpose or interest was and even if she wanted to, she could never give him her virginity like good girlfriends in the romance stories did. She could not comfort him as he did her, could not be his equal, and could not give up her past for him. She was not enough for Zuko, not enough for the group so why bother anymore? The one person in the world that truly needed her, she would not be enough for, the only difference being that little bit she had to offer was priceless.

Robotically, she pulled herself to her feet and picked through her things, pulling out two crumpled scrolls, a quill and ink.

_Time to grow up, _she thought as she began to scrawl her last connection with these friends, this love, that she thought would last a lifetime. _Time to accept what I really am._

_**Thanks for reading guys! You need to read this AN! VERY IMPORTANT AN! READ THIS! READ THIS! READ THIS AN! SERIOUSLY READ IT! READ THIS AN! READ IT! READ THIS AN READ IT READ IT NOW! ITS A VERY IMPORTANT AN! READ THIS! THIS IS IMPORTANT!**_

_**There are some things you need to do. **_

_**1. Skim through Secrets She Kept. There are some notes, some simple things, minute details that will enlighten you and make you understand what will happen in the next chapter.**_

_**2. Find the song! The name of the chapter is a quote from a song by Cocorosie that explains the relationship between Kunai and another character you'll see. **_

_**3. Listen to the song 'Sweet' by Plumb. However, it'd not about what you think in the context of the story.**_

_**4. Share this story! Tell your friends, write oneshots, draw pictures, please!**_

_**5. If any of you can sing, I have re-written some songs or the story that I would love you to sing**_

_**Beta'd By Tonights The Night. **_

_**I didnt even need to show up. **_


	5. Oh, How She Favors Her Mother

_**Welcome back my friends. Very very very important AN at the bottome, check it out**_

_**Oh, How She Favors Her Mother**_

Zuko lay in bed and made a list of three things he knew to be certain.

The first: He probably had a horrendous bruise as he always seemed to forget how strong she was.

The second: Although it seemed like it at the time, she hadn't want him at all last night. The writhing, the nails, were all attempts to push him away not beckoning him to go further.

The third: The birthday present he'd gotten her would not be nearly enough to patch up with gaping wound in their relationship.

With a groan he rolled out of bed. He could feel the presence of the sun much more intensely then when he usually woke up, a sign that he had overslept. He stumbled into the courtyard, expecting some sort of training to be going on only to see everyone solemnly sitting on the front steps, Sokka holding a crumpled scroll in hand.

"I can't believe she would do this! The comets almost here and she just leaves?!" Katara cried out, the hurt and betrayal obvious in her voice.

"Whatever she left for, it seems important," Toph murmured, sounding disturbingly serious.

"That doesn't change the fact she just left with no clue as to where she might be going!" Katara said.

Sukki, who appeared on the brink of tears, sighed deeply. "How are we gonna tell Zuko?"

"Tell Zuko what?" The older boy made his presence known in a demand. "Where's Kunai?"

The group exchanged nervous looks, with the exception of Toph, trying to silently decide who would break the news. Sokka sighed, and stood up.

"Kunai's gone. She left a note."

Zuko felt his heart sink, the words stabbing deep into his chest as he processed exactly what Sokka had said. He grit his teeth and clenched his fists.

"Give me the note." he said with much effort put into controlling his voice.

"Zuko, I think you should-"

"_Give me the note_!" He saw everyone visibly flinch as he barked. He didn't care. Sokka quickly handed the older boy the scroll. Zuko gripped it tight in his fist and stormed back inside, nearly tearing it open when he got to his room.

_By the time you read this I'll be gone,_ is said,_ from the island where you won't find me. First off, I want you to know this isn't as sudden as it may seem. I've been thinking about leaving since I first joined the group, knowing a day would come where I'd have to stop running from my past. You guys were all such great friends but some friendships can never last and this is one of them. I'm not as good a bender as you make me out to be, not as powerful and not nearly as useful. I forfeited my destiny as the Avatar's Apprentice a long time ago. There's no point in pretending. It is cold and cowardly of me to leave this note instead of facing up to you personally but, like I said, I'm not who you think I am. I'm a coward and I'm a liar for ever making a commitment with you. Don't look for me, you won't find me. _

_Kunai_

By the time he reached the end, the edge were singed, the paper on the brink of destruction. He hurled it against the wall, growling in primal anger. To add to his irritation, there was a knock at his door. He flung it open, scowling in hopes of scaring away whoever dared bother him. Much to his annoyance, it was Toph. Unfazed, she held up another scroll with his name written delicately.

"Hey Hotpants, thought you should have the letter actually meant for you." He blinked, his features softening just slightly. He took the letter roughly turned away from her.

"Hey Sparky?"

"What!?" he snapped.

"I'm sorry." Shocked at actual sympathy, he turned to see her walking away with an air of pride. With a heavy sigh he closed the door, resolving to at least attempt to be calm as he read his letter.

_Dear Zuko, _

_Let me first say that no matter what you may think, I have always loved you. You were the best friend I've ever had. What happened last night isn't what made me leave, it was just the catalyst of a lot of built up tension and lies to you and myself. _

_I don't know how you feel about me. I think you care about me, as much as that scares me. All I can ask of you now is that you forget everything you feel for me because it's all lies. You don't know the real me, the real you've been wasting your time on. You may care about me, but you don't need all these problems, you don't need me. I wish that you needed me. I wish that you knew I'd always be there for you. I wish that I could tell you the truth and you wouldn't hate me but that's entirely too much to ask of you. Not telling you everything is the last selfish act I'll hurt you with. I don't want to go on knowing you think of me as everyone else does. _

_One day, you'll fall in love and be happy. You could never do that with me._

_Kunai_

Zuko clung desperately to his pride, trying not to give into his emotions but when the lump in his throat became too thick to bear he surrendered himself and broke down, crying for the first time in what felt like an eternity. He buried his face in his knees, tears silently burning down his cheeks.

If this is what love was, abandoning someone for your own adventures and leaving them a damn note, then he wanted no part of it. She'd lied to him, betrayed him and he already missed her. Part of him wanted to terrorize the world to find her, burning down anything and anyone that got in his way. He stomped the floor in frustration and heard a clang as his small bag toppled off the nightstand. Out of the bag rolled two silver armbands, worked into breathtaking patterns and swirls and encrusted with red jewels. They'd been intended to be Kunai's birthday gift along with his first proclamation of those three priceless words that she'd now used to tear holes in his heart.

While part of him wanted to still be with her, another part of him arose. That part wanted nothing to do with her. That part wanted to hate her, to forget she's ever existed and to never let himself fall for another woman's charms. That's all it was to her anyway, a game of charms.

Hatred was easy. However, lusting over something he couldn't have was unbearable.

Right now, the easiest way seemed like the only way.

* * *

Katara stormed aimlessly through the woods, angry tears welling in her eyes. Kunai was their hope, Aang's only advantage over the Fire Lord. Kunai had known that, yet she ran off anyway.

Consumed by rage, Katara didn't notice someone tracking behind her until the person spoke.

"Well well well. Someone's wander far from home." Katara whirled around to see Azula, leaning against a tree and examining her nails. Katara gasped and lowered into a stance, drawing the water quickly out of her pouch.

"What are you doing here!?"

Azula chuckled, turning her eyes upon the Water Tribe girl.

"No need to be defensive. I just want to make a deal with you."

Katara scowled deeper, waiting for the princess to strike.

"What makes you think I would make a deal with you?"

Azula rolled her eyes. "Let me cut to the chase. We both know what I want, the Avatar and victory in this war. Now I know I'll get both those things. The only question is how exactly do I do that? This could all work to your benefit, Katara."

Katara grit her teeth. "What are you talking about?"

"It's simple. I've seen you in action and I must admit you are a powerful waterbender. You could work well on my team-"

"I would never help you!" Katara yelled.

Azula chuckled. "Oh yes yes I know. Your poor mommy got killed and now you hate the Fire Nation. Trust me, I get it. But what if you're precious Avatar would be spared?" Azula began to circle the tense young girl, eyeing her decisively.

"If you join me, I won't kill the Avatar and I won't melt your pathetic tribe to the ground."

Katara whipped around, her eyes widened in terrified shock. "You wouldn't!"

"Oh I would." The princess purred. "As we speak, seven empire class ships are headed towards that little block of ice. Now I could call them off just as easily as I could hop into my airship and join them. And once I'm done with that, I'll wipe your little Avatar off the face of the earth. Your choice."

Katara stared blankly ahead of her. Her stomach churned, her blood nearly freezing as it all sunk in. Join the enemy or risk the lives of everyone she loved. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to devise a plan. If she ran now she could alert the other. They could fight Azula off together and then head South. Taking out seven ships wasn't impossible. Her plan solidified, she took a deep breath. She took off but in mid-stride the princess's hand locked onto her shoulder. Electricity shot through the younger girl, coursing through every bit of her body.

She dropped the unconscious Water Tribe girl to the ground, smirking. She sauntered through the woods to a cliff side where her airship was hovering just over the water's surface. She hopped down, landing gracefully upon the top.

"This is going to be fun."

* * *

The others were just beginning to worry about Katara's whereabouts when Katara came running out of the woods, disheveled and frantic. Sokka ran to her.

"Katara, are you ok!?" he demanded as he looked her over. Katara nodded, panting heavily.

"Sokka, I'm fine. But something happened." She explained to them Azula's deal and that the princess was now gone, presumably to start her attack on the South Pole. Sokka stiffened, the warrior in him coming out at the threat upon his people.

"We've gotta intercept that fleet."

"But what about Aang!" Katara said.

"That's what she wants. If we go, she'll kill him."

"And if we don't she'll kill the whole village! Look, we've fought Azula before, we can do it again," Sokka said sternly, holding his head high. Suki nodded, taking his arm.

"I think Sokka's right."

Aang nodded. "I can defend myself Katara. You don't have to worry about me." He smiled brightly at her and she returned it, weak and forced. Toph nodded, slamming her fists into her palm.

"If it's a fight she wants, it's a fight she'll get."

Sokka nodded. "So we all agree?"

"What about Zuko?" Suki asked. He'd retreated to the beach hours ago and no one had dared confront him.

"Leave that to me. Pack up Appa, we need to leave as soon as possible." Everyone dispersed to get their things while Sokka headed to the beach. Zuko was curled into a tight ball, unmoving except for the rise and fall of his back as he heaved in and out. Sokka walked up to him.

"Leave me alone." Zuko snapped, still staring blankly into the ocean.

"We need to leave the island. Azula's going to destroy the South Pole if we don't."

Zuko turned around and Sokka put up a hand, cutting off whatever question the older teen was about to ask. "I'll explain it all later. Right now, we've got to leave."

Zuko grumbled and stood up. As he tried to brush past Sokka, the younger boy caught his shoulder.

"For what it's worth, we all get you're upset."

Zuko jerked away and kept walking, not even validating that comment with a response. He wasn't upset at her disappearance. Not at all. She was probably skipping around with her old militia buddies, having a damn great time. Why should he be upset?

However, she was not among friends. Rather, she was in the hull of a cargo ship, smoking a joint. The ship was passing by Sacora Island and for a few silver pieces the crew had been fine with her hitchhiking. The rest of her money had been spent on the weed that she'd been chain smoking for hours.

One of the few crewmen stepped silently into the room, smiling to himself. He walked over to her.

"Can I help you with something?" Kunai startled the older man as she sat up, glaring at him with disgust. The man jumped back slightly but a smile spread on his face. He brought a finger to tip up her chin.

"You're a pretty little thing," he murmured. She didn't respond, her eyes following him as he walked around the bed behind her, bringing his hands to knead her shoulders.

"Now I'm not going to ask you to do anything you haven't done before, I'm sure."

Kunai chuckled dryly, shaking her head. "Oh really?" Her hand slipping discreetly under her pillow. The man chuckled, bringing his lips just shy of her ear.

"You'll enjoy this, sweetheart. Trust me." As his hand began to slip down her collarbone, Kunai whipped around, dragging her knife across the vulnerable flesh of his abdomen, shallow enough to be repairable, deep enough to hurt like hell. The man yelled, jumping back and gripped his bloody stomach, doubling over in pain.

"The fuck, bitch!" he screamed, stumbling from her. Kunai stood up and grabbed him by the collar.

"I'm a lot of things but I'm not weak," she snarled, pointing the bloody tip of the knife at him. "Do _not_ mess with me." She released his collar and lay back in bed, listening as he scurried out with his tail between his legs. Kunai shut her eyes, tears dripping freely down her cheeks, pooling on the edge of her nose. She cried herself to sleep, gripping the bloody knife close as if her only reminder that she had some control in this forsaken world.

* * *

It would be take a week to reach the North Pole and three days into the trip, Zuko patience was already fading away. He woke up every morning thinking about Kunai and every morning he had to deal with the realization she wasn't there and wouldn't ever be there again. No one talked to him, in fear of catching the brunt of his bottled up emotions.

"Guys we've got to land. Appa's tired," Aang said, gentling patting the beast.

"Where are we supposed to land? We're in the middle of the ocean!" Sokka exclaimed, waving his arms around to motion at the blue abyss beneath them. Aang scanned the horizon, pointing excitedly as a tiny island came into view.

"There's a spot!" He steered Appa over the island, landing him in a lush clearing. Appa groaned and almost immediately fell asleep.

Toph leapt down, falling face first onto the ground and making angels. "Land! Sweet land!"

Katara chuckled as she crawled off, stretching her limbs. "Why don't you reacquaint your feet with the ground and walk into town to get us some food."

Toph nodded and stood up, brushing a bit of dirt of her face. "Fine. Hey Sparky, you're coming with me!"

Zuko glanced over at her in surprise, as no one had really even addressed him in the last 3 days.

"Why do I have to go?"

"Because you've got money and the poor little blind girl needs protection. Now come on!" Toph grabbed his arm and began dragging him towards the town. Zuko rolled his eyes and stomped broodingly beside her, silent the entire walk to town. When they finally arrived at the tiny market place, they found an odd gathering of Fire Nation citizens, walking around almost as if tourists. Poor children ran around, begging at the feet of anyone dressed in red, Fire Nation men chatted happily as their shoes were shined by the Earth Kingdom citizens. Zuko sighed deeply.

"This must be Sacora Island. A lot of Fire Nation people come here because of the beaches and exploit the natives." Zuko grumbled as they walked throughout the town. Toph nodded, beginning to say something when her mouth snapped shut and she froze in place.

"Uh… Sparky?"

"What is it?"

"You're not gonna believe this but Kunai's here."

* * *

Kunai wandered through the small town, her heart growing heavy as she observed the injustice in the town. From now until she could support herself, this would be her life and she barely knew where she was going.

"Kunai?" She turned to a familiar voice and the first smile she'd worn in days crossed her face as she ran to embrace and old friend.

"Ekiri…"Kunai whispered. Ekiri giggled, her eyes glazing with ecstatic tears.

"Oh Spirits, just look at you! I had no idea you were coming."

Kunai forced a smile. "I promised I'd come when I was seventeen." She bit her lip, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I um… I don't have anywhere to stay," she whispered, casting her eyes down. Ekiri sighed, giving a friendly pat on the back as she led the younger girl through the market to a small brick house.

"You can stay here as long as you need." She tilted Kunai's head up, examining her face.

"What's wrong?"

Kunai looked away, trying to hold back tears.

"I… I gave a lot up." She sniffed and added, "Ekiri I don't wanna talk about this." Ekiri nodded understandingly.

"It's fine, Dragon. Come on inside. She went to sleep about a hour ago, she should be waking up now." Kunai attempted to smile but only tightened her lips, nodding as she walked inside the house that would now be her home.

* * *

Zuko looked around and sure enough, there she was, walking along with an older looking woman and chatting casually. He snarled and took a step forward. Toph's hand slammed against his chest, holding him back.

"Cool it, Hotpants. If you want to talk to her let's figure out what's going on first."

Zuko grumbled and grit her teeth, nodding reluctantly. He followed Toph through the market, arriving outside the door once the two women were inside. Zuko put his ear to the door while Toph focused on what was happening inside

"Kunai's heartbeat is going insane." She 'watched' as Kunai walked over to a little girl, concentrated on the mumbled conversation she was having with her dolls.

"She's so big." Kunai whispered. Ekiri chuckled and put her arms around Kunai.

"She's looking more like her mother every day." Just then the figure turned around. She was small for a three year old, black hair in an untamable mess around her head. Clutched in her hands was a rag doll dressed in red. The little girl eyed Kunai.

"Kiri… who's that?" she asked innocently, rocking back on her toes. Ekiri smiled.

"Do you remember what I told you about your real Mama?"

The little girl pursed her lips and furrowed her brow. Suddenly her big violet eyes lit up with realization and a smile split her face.

"You're my real Mama!" she squeaked, jumping up and down in glee, a natural glow about her. Kunai nodded and knelt down as the little girl bounded towards her, falling into Kunai's arms as she giggled. Kunai squeezed the little girl tight, tears streaming down her face. She kissed her head over and over, rocking her back and forth.

"Yeah… I'm you're real Mama Kameko."

**_Cliffhanger cuz that's how I rolls mo-fo_**

**_This An will tell you nothing about the story. _**

**_Info piece number 1: Follow me on tumblr at livingloving123 or spooky-firelady. You can also follow AskKunai so you can ask her little questions and what not. _**

**_Info piece number 2: I want your contributions! I WANT IT! FANART! DRABBLES! SIMPLY SHARING AND TELLING FRIENDS, IT IS ALL SO PRICELESS TO ME! PLEASE DO IT! PLEASE! I'LL LOVE YOU FOREVER!_**

**_Info piece number 3:I have re-written some songs for the story and if you'd like me to sing them, tell me in a review_**

**_Info piece number 4: It's time to release the playlist!_**

**_Sweet by Plumb_**

**_Me by Plumb_**

**_Cut by Plumb_**

**_Werewolf by Cocorosie_**

**_Breath Me by Sia_**

**_Arms by Christina Peri_**

**_Jar of Hearts by Christina Peri_**

**_Check out the songs and review please my pretties!_**


	6. The lying whore

_**Welcome back! AN at the bottom and I will not apologize for that last cliffhanger**_

_**The lying whore  
**_

Zuko's heart stopped. Bile rose in the back of his throat. The word reverberated in his mind, each repetition cutting him deeper and deeper.

Mama . . . Mama. . . Mama

"You heard that?" Toph asked. Zuko gulped and nodded. Anger boiled in him, replacing every other emotion. Sparks erupted from his fingertips.

Toph sighed. "For the millionth time Sparky, calm down. We still don't know-"Before she could finish he threw open the door. The three gasped and turned to him. Kunai's eyes widened, his name leaving her throat in a whisper. He locked eyes with her, silent rage emanating from every pore. Kunai released the little girl from her grip, standing up.

"You… you liar! You fucking lied to me!" he shouted, taking a step towards her.

"Zuko calm down!" Toph urged but it went unheard. Kunai began to trembled, her mouth hanging open.

"Zuko I… I'm sorry!" she squeaked and ran past him, bolting out the door. Zuko growled, looking after her remorselessly.

"You need to leave now," Ekiri commanded, pointing out the door. Zuko gladly turned to walk out when he felt something tugging at his pant leg. He looked down and met bright purple eyes. The toddler was looking up at him, delicate features twisted into a scowl.

"Why'd you make Mama leave!?" she demanded, clenching her fists. Zuko looked at her and realized that every bit of her looked like Kunai. The roundness of her cheeks, the black hair, her eyes, purple and full of fire. He jerked away from her with full intentions of walking away when a sharp pain shot through his leg. He stumbled and gripped the doorframe, looking down at the burnt hole in his pant leg. Ekiri came over and swept the little girl up, multicolored sparks flickering from her fists as she glared at him.

"Like I said, you need to leave."

"Gladly." Zuko limped away. He wanted to get on Appa and leave her, look back with no remorse and forget her existence.

Toph gripped his arm and forced him around.

"Look Hotpants! Just because you're pissy doesn't mean you can act like such a little bitch. Go find your girlfriend and figure this thing out."

"Girlfriend? She's not my girlfriend! She never was! She's just a lying whore!" he shot back. Toph stomped the ground angrily.

"Fine then! Just stomp off! I'm going to go find her!" With that she turned and left, searching for Kunai.

* * *

Toph found Kunai alone in an alley, curled into a small ball. Kunai glanced over to see Toph sitting next to her.

"So… you've got a kid?"

Kunai nodded, running her fingers through her hair. "I promised… I would come take care of her when I was old enough," she whispered. Toph sighed, nodding.

"Look, if you don't want to tell me then I get it. But I gotta ask who this kid's dad is."

Kunai breathed a humorless chuckle. "Everyone who's ever known thinks I'm a whore. A filthy, stupid whore."

"Well lucky for you, I'm special. So shoot."

Kunai nodded, steady tears dripping down her cheeks. The younger girl already new the product of her dirty little secret. Why not know the whole thing?

"I was thirteen…"

"_One more!" Kunai laughed, sprawling over Sheo as he held the pipe away from her. _

"_No! Dragon you are messed up enough!" He chuckled, nudging her away. Calila came around, snatching the pipe from his hands and handing it to Kunai. _

"_It's a party sugar dick! Let her have some fun!" _

"_Sugar dick?" Kunai laughed._

_Calila nodded, leaning into to whisper. _"_It tastes like sugar." _

_Kunai fell back laughing hysterically. She sucked in a deep breath of the intoxicating smoke, colors bursting in her vision. She smiled lazily as she pulled it away from her mouth. _

"_One more shot and I'm done!" she slurred. _

_Emi brought over four shots of whiskey. "Ok. To friends, to family, to getting fucked up!" They clinked their shot glasses and downed them all at once. Sheo tossed an arm around the youngest member of the group, kissing the dark haired girl on the head. _

"_I may be drunk… but you're hot as hell Kunai." _

_Kunai laughed as he ran a hand up her unscarred thighs, pushing up the hem of her short skirt. _

"_Seriously let's fuck! Like, right now! Let's fuck!" he cried, crashing his lips against hers. She kissed him back for a moment before shoving him away and falling into another fit of giggles. _

"_You're gonna have to sauce me up a little more before I fuck you!" _

* * *

"Toph… I don't want to do this." Kunai said still following behind the young girl.

"You kinda have to, for my sake. I don't want to have to kill Hotpants for being a bastard."

"Toph you don't understand!"

Toph clenched her fists and stopped in her tracks. "Look! Maybe I don't understand everything, but I do understand that Zuko has no right to treat you like this. It pisses me off. Just shut up because you don't have a choice! If I have to lock you in a box of rocks and drag you, you're gonna talk to him!" She continued stomping towards their camp. Kunai followed, every bit of her screaming for her to run back to her daughter, to forget being a girlfriend and be a mother.

"Sparky!" Toph shouted. He was sitting alone in a singed clearing, smoke still billowing out of his nostrils. He turned around, his scowl deepening when he saw Kunai. He turned his head in an attempt to hide the drying tears on his cheeks. Toph snarled and stomped her foot into the ground, knocking Zuko to his feet.

"You two are gonna talk now!" Toph commanded and left them alone, storming back to camp. Zuko looked at Kunai. Her eyes were swollen, fresh tears still on her cheeks, her eyes drained of the sparkle he once loved. She had no right to be upset. He crossed his arms and glared down at her.

"What do you have to say for yourself?" he demanded. Kunai dropped her head.

"I'm sorry-"

"You're sorry!? You think 'sorry' makes this better!? You lied to me; you said you'd never had a boyfriend!"

"I didn't," she whispered.

"You didn't!? Oh well then was it just some one night stand or-"

"_Stop_!"

Zuko reared back.

"You have _no_ _idea_ what you're talking about!"

Her anger only fueled his need for confrontation. He started yelling. "Then explain this to me! Explain how you could hide having a fucking kid with some other guy when you were fourteen! After all this shit, I at least deserve an explanation."

Kunai wrapped her arms around her chest, letting out a shaky breath. "We… we had this party. I got really wasted and I… I went walking by myself and I got lost. This guy Crico from the militia followed me." She began to sob harder and harder. "I was only a kid and… he was a lot older. I shouldn't have been off by myself and I should've been able to fight him off. He was just so strong. He told me I was a tease and everyone believed it was my fault and that I wanted it but I didn't!"

Zuko gaped, cold realization seeping into his veins as he processed her explanation. "Kunai…" he whispered, taking a step towards her.

"I'm so sorry I lied to you! I didn't want you to think of me like everyone else did and-"

He cut her off by pulling her into his arms, gripping her tight to his chest. He was ashamed. He'd jumped to conclusions, persecuting and hurting the innocent women he loved but above that he was angry, angry at the thought of anyone laying a hand on her. He wanted to kill whoever this bastard was, set him on fire and watch him burn. However, right now, he had to comfort her. Kunai was his priority.

Kunai looked up at him in surprise.

"You're not mad?" She sniffed. Zuko shook his head, holding her tighter.

"No. You didn't do anything. I'm so so sorry Kunai." His voice cracked. Kunai finally hugged him back, holding him like a life ring.

"Why are you even here?" she whispered into his chest.

"Azula's got a fleet of ships headed towards the South Pole. She threatened to destroy it if Katara didn't join her."

Kunai blinked, worry crossing her face. "Azula…"

"What is it?" Zuko asked, tipping her head up.

"Azula… she knows about her… about Kameko. She whispered her name to me when we fought at the Boiling Rock. That's part of why I came now, to protect her."

Zuko sighed, running a palm over his face. "Kunai you've never really fought Azula. You can't take her, not by yourself. I wouldn't be surprised if she planned to come here anyway."

Kunai narrowed his eyes at him. "What are you saying?"

"It's not safe here."

Kunai dropped her head and sighed, the only option unspoken between them. "The others-"

"They don't matter. You need to come with us," he said. He took her hand in his, bringing her it to his lips and pressing a gentle kiss against her knuckles. She squeezed his hand and looked up at him in awestruck affection. However she quickly averted her gaze, heading off to towards town. She couldn't lose herself in him because right now, he was only being a friend. Sooner or later, it would all come crashing down.

They walked back to the house together in comfortable silence. Ekiri opened the door and looked at the pair.

"So you two worked things out?"

Kunai nodded. "Yeah we did. Ekiri… I've got to take Kameko," she said.

Ekiri blinked, staring at her blankly. "This is…sudden."

Kunai sucked in her bottom lip. "I know but-"

Zuko spoke up.

"But it's not safe to stay here. Someone's after us and they could hurt her. We need to get her away from here as soon as possible."

Ekiri stood mouth agape as she took in the idea of losing the little girl so suddenly.

Kameko trotted into the room, bouncing over to grasp her mother's leg.

"Mama! Mama! You came back!"

Kunai knelt down to the little girl and pulled her into her arms, lifting her up on her hips. "Yep. Kameko, you're gonna come stay with me for a while, ok?"

Kameko giggled and clapped her hands.

"Will you show me your room so we can pack up your stuff?"

Kameko nodded, hopping down and leading her away by the hand, leaving Zuko standing with the older woman. Ekiri sighed and stepped up to him.

"I don't you; I don't know anything about you. All I know is Kunai trusts you and she doesn't trust anyone, especially men like you with anger issues. You need to take care of her and Kameko, no matter what."

Zuko, intimidated, nodded. "I promise nothing will happen to them. You have my word."

Ekiri gave a tight-lipped smile as Kameko skipped in in front of Kunai.

"We're ready." Kunai said, taking Kameko's hand in hers. Kameko nodded, smiling. Ekiri smiled and picked the little girl up, kissing her on the cheek.

"You be good for Mama, ok?" she said, forcing a strong smile as tears welled in her eyes. Kameko nodded. "I promise!"

Ekiri set her down, smiling as the little girl ran back to her mother's side. Kunai hugged Ekiri.

"Thank you so much." Kunai whispered. Ekiri gave her one last squeeze before releasing her.

"It's been amazing." Kunai smiled back as they walked out. Zuko turned back to Ekiri, giving Ekiri another silent look to say that he'd protect them no matter what.

The three walked through the town together, Zuko stealing glances at the little girl who was steadily glaring at him. He looked up, a figure catching his attention. He appeared to be a normal Fire Nation civilian, though he stood stiff, eyes flickering amongst the crowd. It took Zuko a moment before he recognized him as a soldier, one of Azula's personal spies.

"We need to get out of here. Now." Zuko said. Kunai nodded, quickly kneeling down to lift Kameko up on her hip. Kameko, unaware of the change of pace, played with her mother's braid as she was carried through the woods to where the rest of the group was resting.

"Kunai!" all but Toph shouted in unison. The excitement was overtaken by confusion at the little girl in Kunai's arms and resentment on Katara's part.

"Who's the kid?" Sokka asked.

"That's not important now. Azula's got spies. We need to go." Zuko said, hopping up on Appa who was still peacefully asleep. The others nodded understandingly, gathering their things and tossing them up in the saddle.

"What's going on?" Kameko inquired, clinging to her mother's neck. Kunai smiled down at her, stroking her cheek.

"Nothing, baby. Everything's fine."

Kameko nuzzled into Kunai's chest as they took off. Aang searched the horizon.

"I think we're safe for now. I don't see any- AAAAH!" Aang tugged Appa's reigns to the side, just barely evading a fireball that seemed to appear out of nowhere. From out on the clouds came an ornate airship, Azula standing smugly on top.

"Mama!" Kameko whimpered, staring in terror at the approaching ship. Kunai brought her hand to the back of Kameko's head, pulling the little girl into her chest.

"Shhh. It's ok Kameko. Everything's fine."

"Well I see you've found your little whore. Now I can take you out all at once." An acidic smirk played across Azula's face as she began hurling fireballs them. Sokka took Appa's reigns while Aang went to deflect fireballs. Zuko and Katara worked at his side.

"Mama! Make it stop!" Kameko shrieked, clutching her mother's shirt and sobbing into her chest. Kunai gripped the little girl tight, stroking her back and speaking in calm comfort all while fear blossomed in her heart.

"You're ok baby. I've got you. You're safe." Kunai turned to Katara. "We need cover!"

Katara grit her teeth and bent the water from the clouds around her.

"I'm going with her," she said.

Sokka whirled around. "No! I'm not gonna let her take you!"

Katara dropped her head. "I'll be fine Sokka. If I'm the one she wants, I'm the one she gets." Katara whipped her hands out, forming an ice bridge to the air ship, running across it as it melted behind her.

"No!" Aang screamed, making a move to go after her. Zuko caught his shoulder.

"She knows what she's doing. We need to get out of here. I know Azula and there's nothing that's going to stop those ships but us."

Aang clenched his fists and silently went back to take Appa's reigns, staring straight ahead.

Kunai buried her head into the little girl's hair, rocking her back and forth. Tiny muffled sobs escaped the toddle as tears soaked her mother's shirt.

"Mama I'm scared!"

Kunai kissed her head, tears prickling in her own eyes. "Shh. You're safe now. You're ok. My sweet, sweet baby, you're safe." She cupped the young girl's cheek, tilting her face up to look into lavender eyes filled with innocence and glazed with tears.

"You're safe, Kameko. I promise nothing will ever happen to you," she whispered with conviction. She pulled the little girl back to her chest, rocking her back and forth, singing softly.

"_My baby dragon, rest in your dreams. I will take care of you though it does seem, someday you'll grow up and find your own way. My baby dragon, in my heart please stay…"_ She continued to hum until her daughter's breath grew slow and even. Kunai let out a sigh of relief and cradled the sleeping child, rocking her in her arms.

"I think we lost them." Sokka said. Everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief, the tension beginning to diminish when Sokka looked to Kunai.

"Hey uh… who's the kid?"

Kunai squeezed her eyes shut and bowed her head. "She's… my daughter," she ground out. Sokka pressed his lips together and scratched the back of his neck, knowing not to pry further. Aang on the other hand, was not so intuitive.

"Wait, you have a kid? How old is she?"

Zuko shot Aang a warning look that went unnoticed.

"Three and a half," she said quietly. The wheels began to turn in the young monk's head.

"Aang…" Zuko warned.

"Wait so… you were thirteen!?"

"Aang!" Zuko snapped. Kunai looked around, the questioning gazes boring into her skin and weighing down on her.

"I… I don't want to talk about it." She gathered Kameko in her arms and scurried to the far end of Appa's saddle. Zuko clenched his fists and scowled at the young boy.

"What the hell Aang!?"

Aang shrunk back, shrugging. "Sorry. It's just that the monks always taught us celibacy."

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head as anger once again bubbled up inside of him.

"Aang she was…"The word stuck on his tongue, to disgusting to vocalize. "…taken advantage of."

Aang dropped his head into his hands. "Oh man… I didn't-"

"Don't." Zuko cut him off. "It's… Look, I'll just go talk to her."

He left the others, sitting at her side. Her gaze was fixed upon the picture of peace in her lap, a trail of tears running down her cheek.

"Are you ok?" Zuko asked. Kunai shut her eyes and took in a deep breath.

"Zuko, I you've always been there for me. Thank you for that and I know that you don't wanna be with me anymore and I completely understand and all I ask is that you just tell me to my face and that's the only thing I want from you." She spewed the words quickly on one breath. Zuko stared at her, taken aback. She was giving him a way out, and easy escape from what would surely be an arduous journey. Zuko was beginning to lose his old resolve to take the easy road.

"Kunai… I don't want to leave you."

She turned to him, glittering eyes in shock.

"But-"

"Let me finish," he said quietly. "I know this is going to be different but that doesn't change how I feel about you. This…" He glanced down Kameko. "This isn't your fault. What happened to you was horrible but I still… I still love you." The proclamation was a great relief, having been bottled up for so long. It tasted sweet and felt natural, like something he wanted to say every day from here on out. More tears prickled in her eyes as she gazed at him, unsure of what he had just said.

"Love me?"

He nodded, placing a hand upon her cheek, wiping away the tears.

"I love you," he repeated, a certainty coming through his voice. Kunai dropped her head, placing a hand over his.

"I'm really messed up" she sobbed. "I can't be a good girlfriend."

Zuko sighed. "All you have to do is be you. That's all I want." He scanned her face, the pain etched so deeply that it was hard to believe this was the same girl he'd met in Ba-Sing-Se. That girl had been unbreakable, wise, and so full of confidence. Now he was seeing her for what she was. Underneath the strength was a broken and scared little girl who needed support. And he would support her.

"I…" A pink tongue came to wet the young woman's lips. She tried to form the words she'd felt for so long. "I love you Zuko." The words left her mouth before she collapsed into sobs. Zuko pulled her into his chest, pressing his lips against her hair as she sobbed.

"Thank you," she whispered and he didn't need to ask why. He simply held her tighter until her breaths grew deep and even. He didn't know what was ahead, how things would change. However he knew one thing for sure: he would never let go of her again.

* * *

Azula paced back and forth outside the ship, a pleased smile on her face.

"You made the right choice Katara. However, there's been a change on plans."

Katara scowled. "We had a deal."

"Don't you know, peasant. I _always_ lie. Guards!"

The guards advanced upon the young waterbender with cuffs and chains. Katara retreated, but another guard came up behind her, catching her wrists. Katara struggled, landing a lucky kick to the guard's crotch. He cried out and stumbled back, releasing his grip as he stumbled against the railing. Katara flipped over the edge. She clawed desperately as she slid down the airship. A desperate scream ripped through her throat as she lost her grip, plummeting through the sky. Azula scowled, watching her tumble towards the ocean.

"You moronic fool!" Azula shrieked at the guard. "If I weren't already understaffed, I would toss you over as well you incompetent idiot!" Azula jabbed a manicured fingernail into the man's chest. She sighed deeply, pinching the bridge of her nose. "No matter now. Alert the ships to slow their course, not to arrive there for five days' time. My brother knows I wouldn't abandon my plans. We'll give them the fight they've been asking for."

_**Well wasn't that a hoot. There is the answer to why Kunai is so messed up!**_

_**Writing this chapter and the following chapter sent me into bouts of depression.  
**_

_**Anywho.  
**_

_**My tumblr blogs are still open for you my lovelies. avatar-opinions is open for you to send me asks for me to analyze (formerly known as avatar-over-analysis but because some people were bitches, it was changed) alsom livingloving123 is my fanfiction blog and christmas-url-motherfuckers is my personal blog!  
**_

_**I'd love to answer your asks about the story.  
**_

_**Coming up the gaang meets Azula in the south pole with a surprising outcome.  
**_

_**Chapter 1o will be the last chapter of this story. By the end we'll meet another OC is a dramatic and shocking fashion. We'll see more of the ball of light that is Kameko. I'm starting a new story with a different theme just as the first one had a different theme than this one. I need help on the title though  
**_

_**Riding into the Sunset  
**_

_**Your spirit  
**_

_**A noble once more**_

_**I dunno! Ugh  
**_

_**Anyway more playlist fun!  
**_

_**Breath Me by Sia  
**_

_**Nicest Thing by Kate Nash  
**_

_**Beautiful by James Blunt  
**_

_**Samson by Regina Spektor  
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_**Me by Plumb**_

_**Cut by Plumb  
**_

_**Damaged by Plumb  
**_

_**Paradise by Coldplay  
**_

_**A Team by Ed Sheeran  
**_

_**Beautiful Disaster by Jon McLaughlin  
**_

_**Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls  
**_

_**Over You by Daughtry (note that it must be purposely interpreted as such)  
**_

_**She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5  
**_

_**If you can think of some more PM me or shoot me an ask on tumblr!  
**_

_**If you'd like me to perform and posts any on the songs I've re-written for the story, shoot me a PM or an ask. These include  
**_

_**Mine by Taylor Swift  
**_

_**Samson(Kunai) by Regina Spektor  
**_

_**Misery by Maroon 5  
**_

_**Wonderwall by Oasis  
**_

_**Aslo, some discussion questions. Answer these in the review I know you'll send!  
**_

_**1. Is there something Kunai's still hiding?  
**_

_**2. How will this affect her relationship with her daughter?  
**_

_**3. How will Zuko react to Kameko?  
**_

_**4. How will the gaang adapt to their newest member?  
**_


	7. I AM SORRY! NEW CHAP IN AN HOUR

IM SO SORRY!

Ok, I am aware it has been over four months since I last updated. I didn't die, I didn't abandon it. What happened was my laptop crashed and I just got it fixed. I am so sorry for leavin but I'm gonna make up for it! I've got some good things planned and, as an apology, if you'd like I'll write you a oneshot for Secrets She Kept for you! Just shoot me a request! I love you guys so much and thank you for reading this!


	8. Nightmares and monsters

Kunai was awakened by about thirty pounds of little girl dropped onto her stomach. She looked up, gasping for breath, and saw tear-filled eyes staring up at her, Kameko perched upon her abdomen.

"I had a bad dream." she said.

Kunai sat up, pulling the little girl into her chest. "My poor baby…" she whispered, stroking her daughter's hair back. Kameko looked up at her, sniffing and pawing at the wet trails on her cheeks.

"I don't wanna go back to sleep cuz there's monsters."

Kunai's eyes widened her heart dropping.

"_How you holding up kid?" Crico asked as he walked into Kunai's tent where she stared blankly at the ceiling. _

"_I'm tired." Neither her face nor her position changed as he sat next to her. _

"_Then sleep. You know we need you taken care of." He ran a finger down her cheek and she blink. _

"_When I sleep, I see Gorou's face. I see him looking at me when they cut his throat." _

_Crico nodded, looking her up and down. "We all know what it's like to not wanna sleep when there are monsters."_

Kunai's hands trembled as she tried to force herself back to reality. This was not Crico, this was her scared innocent daughter. Crico wasn't here to hurt her.

"You're okay. There's no monsters." She spoke more to herself than anyone but she didn't have the energy to care.

She held the little girl until morning's light came and Kameko was soothed. Her terrors forgotten Kameko began to worry about other more pressing things.

"Mama, I'm hungry."

Kunai smiled. "Well lets see what we can find for you." She fished around in the communal food bag, retrieving a ripe peach. "Why don't you eat this while we wait for everyone else to wake up?"

Kameko retrieved the fruit, rolling it around in her hands before frowning deeply. "Lala can't share my peach. Lala needs her own peach."

"Who's Lala?"

Kameko crawled off her mother's lap and opened up a small bag with her toys. She pulled out a rag doll dressed in red, with short black hair made of strings.

"This is Lala! You gave her to me and she's a firebender and she needs her own peach."

A smile crossed Kunai's face. She nodded happily, handing her another peach. Kameko smiled, holding one between her knees while she propped up her doll and setting the other in her lap. She pointed a chubby finger at the doll.

"Eat your peach Lala!" she commanded before taking a bite, juices squirting all over her face. Kameko giggled and Kunai shook her head with a smile, swiping away the mess with the back of her hand.

"You are going to be so sticky."

Kameko nodded and took another messy bite.

"Good morning."

Kunai looked up, Zuko just a few feet from them, shaking away the last traces of sleep.

"Morning." Kunai replied softly. Zuko smiled and cupped her cheek, placing a chaste kiss on her lips.

"How long have you been up?"

"A few hours. Kameko had a nightmare." She motioned to the toddler singing nonsense to herself. Zuko nodded and reached for the unclaimed peach. Kameko let out a blood-curdling shriek that woke the rest of the group, batting his hand away. Zuko jumped back.

"What happened?" Sokka mumbled from the far side of the saddle, waving his boomerang around.

"Nothing guys. Kameko, stop all that screaming." Kunai scolded. Kameko poked out her lip and crossed her arms.

"He was gonna take Lala's peach!"

"What's Lala?" he asked. Kameko groaned in exasperation and held up the rag doll, holding it out at him.

"This is Lala and she likes peaches and she's a firebender and you can't have her peach and now you have to apo-wa-dize!"

Zuko looked at Kunai who was looking at him with a sympathetic smile.

"Umm…I'm sorry Lala?" he said. Kameko beamed and moved the doll towards him. She took the doll by the arm and made it pat him on the head. She pressed the doll's face to his cheek and made a smacking noise.

"Lala's happy now."

Zuko couldn't hold back the small smile that tugged his lips, an unfamiliar warmth growing in his chest. Kameko put the doll to her ear and made incoherent whispering noises, nodding thoughtfully. She turned to Zuko to deliver the doll's message.

"Lala wants to know what your name is."

"I'm Zuko."

Kameko smiled and nodded, distracted by the peach in her lap. Zuko smiled and scooted next to Kunai.

"She's a sweet kid."

Kunai looked at him with soft meaningful smile.

"Yeah… yeah she is."

Kunai sighed deeply, and pressed her lips against Kameko's forehead. Her skin seared to the point she couldn't hold her lips there for more than a second. The toddler was wrapped in a thick fur coat and wrapped in blankets to fight off the declining temperatures as they approached the South Pole yet she still moaned from cold, writhing in semi-consciousness. The sun was just rising over the water, rousing Zuko.

"You sleep at all?" he asked, wiping sleep from his eyes. Kunai shook her head and sighed deeply.

"Kameko's really sick and I… I don't know what to do." Her voice broke, her entire body trembling. Zuko crawled over to her and put the back of his hand against her forehead.

"Firebenders get high fevers to fend off viruses. This will pass shortly but until then, she'll be pretty lethargic."

Kunai nodded, gritting her teeth and pulling the little girl closer. She drew water out of her pouch and tilted Kameko's head up.

"Come on baby, you gotta drink this."

Kameko quieted and buried her face in her mother's chest. "Mama I don't feel good." She sobbed. Kunai sucked in her bottom lip, dabbing away the sweat of the little girl's brow. Tears welled in her eyes and she spoke past the lump in her throat.

"I know baby, I know…" She placed small kisses on Kameko's forehead, humming and rocking her back and forth.

"Guys wake up! We're here!" Aang yelled, rousing the rest of the gang. They all gazed at the small village as they approached. Appa landed in the snow, gaining the attention of many villagers. Among these was a small, bright eyed old woman.

"Gran-gran!" Sokka squealed, hopping off Appa and running into her embrace. Kanna chuckled and held her grandson out at arm's length.

"My my, how you've grown. And where's my granddaughter?"

Sokka bit his lip and sighed, speaking in a solemn tone. "She got taken. That's part of why we're here. See, the princess of the Fire Nation took her and she's got a naval fleet on their way. We figured it was best to beat her here." While Sokka explained the rest of the situation to Kanna, Kunai fought to pry the restless three-year old off her coat.

"Baby, I gotta put you down for a second."

Kameko groaned, gripping Kunai's coat even tighter.

"Kameko, I've got to get your bags-"

"No Mama!" she shrieked, her voice wavering on the edge of a tantrum. Kunai let out a sigh and knelt down, trying to pick up her bags with one free hand. As one of the smaller packs tumbled out of her arms she groaned and turned to pick up another, only to find it gone. She looked up to see Zuko offering her a small, almost shy smile as he through the bag over his shoulder before scooping up the others and hopping off Appa. Kunai watched him, her expression softening.

Kunai climbed off Appa, rubbing Kameko's back soothingly and whispering into her ear. Kana led them to a large building of ice with several rooms, a product of the last group of Northerners. There were three rooms with two beds each. Cramped but it would do.

"So who's with who?" Toph asked as they walked in.

"Well maybe me and S-"

"Sokka you can stay with Aang. Girls-" Kana said, looking at Toph and Suki. "You can have the room on the end of the hall."

Sokka began to open his mouth but one look at Kana and he heaved a sigh. "Yes Gran Gran."

Zuko awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. "So am I staying with you?"

Before Kunai could respond Kameko looked up at him with koala-doe eyes and nodded, making a noise of approval. Kunai chuckled and looked up at Zuko, giving a silent nod. With a relieved sigh Kunai fell back on the bed, cradling Kameko in her lap. She smiled, brushing her finger against the soft skin of her cheek that poked out underneath her parka.

"Hey baby girl. Sleepy?"

Kameko nodded. "Mmhmm. Cold…"

Kunai grabbed a blanket off the bed, swaddling the little girl like an infant and rocking her as she hummed a lullaby. Kameko cooed in contentment and drifted off to sleep. Zuko watched from the other side of the room, arms crossed as he examined the situation, his heart fluttering as he thought of his own mother, her lullabies, her care, all reflected in the wistful gaze Kunai cast upon the bundle in her lap as if nothing else existed.

Zuko walked over and sat next to her, pressing their thighs together. She closed her eyes, the smile falling from her face.

"Hey," he said in a whisper. She looked up at him.

"Hey."

Silence once again filled the room, thick like fog. Zuko broke it with a quiet reassurance. "You're… you're really good with her." he murmured. Kunai smirked, the awkward words and the innocent expression welling for a moment in her heart, a hint of familiarity.

"Thanks…" She lifted Kameko from her lap, placing her on her side on the pillow and draping yet another blanket over her. Still facing away from him she brushed a strand of hair behind her ear and sighed.

"Why are you with me?" she said, her voice, just a breath.

"What?" Zuko asked. Kunai sighed and tilted her head back, clenching her fists.

"Why are you with me?!" she said, turning around, desperation painted all over her face. Zuko sat open- mouthed, searching for words.

"I…what do-"

"What's in it for you, Zuko? Some kid that's not yours? A girlfriend who's scared to touch you?" Her voice wavered with emotion, her eyes glazing over. She stood up and went over to the window, her breaths ragged and broken. "I just don't understand it and… and that's scary."

Zuko gaped at her for a moment before standing up and going up behind her. He began to reach out and wrap his arms around her waist but decided against it.

"Kunai… I'm with you because…you're you." He gulped, swallowing his nervousness and gathering his words.

"I told you, I love you. Just trust me, okay?"

Kunai bit her lip. "You didn't answer my question."

Zuko sighed, not having to ask. The answer came without a shadow of a doubt. "You."

Kunai turned around, looking up at him yet she saw the sincerity all over his face. He opened his arms.

"Can I?"

Kunai sucked in her bottom lip, squeezing her eyes shut as she nodded and melted into him. She wound her arms around his neck and buried her face in his chest. Zuko held her tight, nuzzling her cheek. He wondered how many times this would happen, how many times he'd have to convince her.

Kunai looked up at him, the smallest smile on her lips. She ran her hands through Zuko's hair, her fingers feather light on his scalp. She pulled him down as she rocked up on her toes, closing the distance between them. As he kissed back she pressed into him and pulled him closer, letting out a quiet sigh. His hands around her waist, his subtle smoky scent, the taste of his lips-this is what she wanted. This, she could do. Kunai pulled away from his lips with a small smack, pressing her forehead against his.

"I like this. I really do. Can we just… take this slow?"

Zuko nodded, squeezing her just a bit tighter. "Of course."

Kunai kissed him once more, smiling against his lips.

"I hope I'm not interrupting."

Kunai and Zuko both jumped back, turning to the doorway where Kanna stood smiling. Zuko turned away, scratching the back of his neck and blushing. Kunai cleared her throat.

"N-no. Not at all."

"I noticed the little one is ill. Come with me, I'll fix you up a little ale that will make her feel much better."

Kunai nodded, beginning to follow after her. As she reached the doorway she turned around, biting her lip. "Hey Zuko. Could you-"

"I'll keep an eye on her."

Kunai's eyes lit up as she slipped out of the room. Zuko sat on the bed and looked at the sleeping little girl. A bead of sweat dribbled down cheek. He reached out, brushing it away with his knuckle. Easily awoken, Kameko opened up her eyes, blinking into consciousness. She eyed him for a second before sitting up and crawling into his lap. He reared back, staring incredulously at the little girl.

"I'm cold Mr. Zuko." she mumbled, looking up at him. Zuko bit his lip and put an arm around her, holding her body against his torso. To his surprise, she relaxed into his touch, taking handfuls of his parka.

"Where's Mama?" she mumbled, rocking on the edge of consciousness.

Zuko smiled down at her. "She's gonna get you some medicine."

Kameko hummed in quiet acknowledgment and fell back to sleep. He'd never held a child. In fact, his experience with children was limited to Azula, her friends and a handful of visiting nobles. Zuko's stiffness faded when he realized there was something fulfilling about this ball of warmth curled in his lap. He gently brushed a strand of soft black hair back into her parka, behind her ear, his fingers lingering on her skin.

A flash of movement in the corner of his eye caused him to look up to see Kunai leaning against the doorway, wearing an odd smile. Zuko flushed and pulled his hand away from Kameko's cheek, clearing his throat. Kunai sauntered in front of him, meeting his eye as she pulled the little girl from his arms and pressed a cup to her lips. Kameko mumbled as she awoke, drinking the sweetened ale. Kunai smiled and pecked the child on the forehead as she sat back down on the bed.

"She's getting to like you."

Zuko smiled draping an arm around her shoulder. "She's a good kid."

Kunai smiled and laid her head on her shoulder. "Well I'm gl-" She was cut off by a loud crash, the distinct cracking of ice. Zuko shot up, Kunai not far behind him as she set Kameko down and skidded into the doorway of the compound where the others were already gathering, her heart pounding. Zuko looked back at her, worry reflected in his eyes. He looked back out to the ocean and she followed his gaze. The first ship was breaking its way through the ice, approaching the village. Azula stood on the deck, eyeing the village. Sokka began to delegate but Kunai heard none of it. She ran back to the room and grabbed Kameko, shaking her awake as she lifted her from the bed and placed her on the floor. Kameko whimpered and cried. Kunai gripped her by the shoulders.

"Listen to me, baby. You gotta wake up okay?" she said, trying and failing to make her voice calm. Kameko sniffed and rubbed her eyes.

"I need you to hide under the bed for me okay? And I don't want you to come out no matter what happens, all right?"

Kameko grumbled but obeyed, crawling under the bed and curling her knees to her chest. Her eyes were wide in confusion and the beginnings of fear. "Mama what's going on?"

Kunai bit her lip for a second, taking a deep sigh. "Everything's gonna be fine. I love you, baby." Her voice tapered to a whisper and it took all her strength to tear herself away from the bed. She ran outside. Suki was leading Toph to the ships while Aang, Sokka and Zuko stood strong and unmovable. Kunai went up beside Zuko, meeting Azula's eye as she approached.

"Well well well, if it isn't the Dragon. This is a rematch I've been waiting for."

Kunai grit her teeth and tipped her head up indignantly.

"I've got your back." Zuko said.

Kunai shook her head. "I've got her. Focus on holding back the rest of the troops."

Before Zuko could reiterate, Azula leapt off the ship and Kunai snarled. "I'll take her."

Azula came down with a wide arc of blue fire. Kunai stood her ground, breaking through it with a dismissive flip of her arm.

"Give it up, Azula. What do you want out of this?"

The two woman paced around each other, each looking for a weakness, an opening.

"Let me think about that? Personal satisfaction from annihilating these savages?"

Azula sent a series of blue fireballs in quick succession. Kunai made a wall of snow in front of her and pushed it forward. The princess melted through it with a chuckle.

"Or maybe just love of confrontation?" Another wall of fire. Kunai evaded it, stepping in closer and closer to Azula. She knew how to fight a firebender, stay far enough to have room to move, just close enough to block long range attacks. Azula played into her tactic.

The two girls fought close, hand to hand until they reached an impasse. Azula's fist grew hotter and hotter in Kunai's hand.

"Or maybe I'm picking off your little rag tag team one at a time."

A moment of shock preceded a growl and Kunai flipped the younger girl to the ground, freezing her arms and legs and placing her foot just against the princess's neck. "And how the hell are you gonna do that, Princess?"

Azula smirked and looked past Kunai. "Look up and tell me, Kunai. What do you see?"

Kunai narrowed her eyes and turned. There was a war balloon hovering in the air, manned by four soldiers. But she saw nothing but her daughter bound and gagged writhing in soldier's arms. The gag fell loose and a shriek tore from her throat, a cry for her mother.

The world went blank.

There was no Azula, no Water Tribe, no friends to protect. There was simply Kameko and whoever stood in her way. Kunai leapt into the air, catapulted by both a gust of air and a moving pillar of ice. Just as the soldiers aimed at her she flicked her wrist, sending as ice blade through one's heart. She came up behind the next and snapped his neck before he was even fully aware of what was going off. One sweeping kick sent the remaining two soldiers off the careening war balloon. All opposing forces neutralized, Kunai jumped to Kameko, scooping her up in her arms and holding her to her chest as she leapt off the balloon. When she hit the ground, vertigo hit her and she crumpled to the ground. She collapsed onto her back, arms still grasping the little girl.

"Mama! Mama there's blood!" Kameko shrieked through terrified sobs. Kunai sat up, looking the little girl over for injuries. Her arm brushed against her rib cage and she groaned as pain shot through her torso. She looked down at a deep gash across her ribs. However the pain was outweighed by the relief that the injury was her own.

"You're okay…" Kunai breathed, falling onto her back, the world beginning to fade. Kameko shrieked and grabbed her mother's cheeks, shaking her head back and forth.

"Mama! Wake up Mama!" she begged. Kunai offered a weak smile, her hand rising to stroke her cheek.

"Baby… you're okay…" She slipped away with a sigh. Kameko squealed and begged for Kunai to wake pounding her small fists on her mother's chest. In desperation, Kameko took off through the battle, looking for anyone to help her.

Meanwhile, Azula's air ship was coming into the horizon, just as planned. The princess took off, propelling herself with powerful blasts of blue fire towards her air ship, her mission complete. As she ran, Sokka cried out in desperation, "Someone needs to take her down _now!" _

Zuko reacted first, cocking his fist back and forming a fireball with all intent to throw it. Yet just as it began to leave his body he realized she couldn't see him. This would hit her square in the back with enough force to knock her out of the air and quite possibly, end it all now. He hesitated.

At the same time, Aang reacted, a thoughtless, wild display of fire balls tearing through the air at the Princess. Fire struck her. A cry, bloodcurdling and strangled, tore through the night sky and Azula fell, hitting the ground with a wet, sickening thud. Everything seemed to dissolve into silence. The soldiers shouting for retreat, the clamor of armor and warriors around- all were silent in Zuko's ears as he walked to where his sister lay, face-down in the snow. The burn on her back was bloody and charred, smoke pouring off of it. Around her was a halo of red, bright and vivid against the snow. She was dead.

Azula was dead.

Zuko stared, unaware of the tiny hands slamming into his legs, growing hotter and hotter with uncontrollable fire.

"Mr. Zuko! You gotta help Mama! _Please!_" The tiny voice slowly maneuvered its way into his conscious mind. He looked down at the blood-covered child, the charred remains of her mittens hanging off her fingers eaten by sparks. Zuko looked over the horizon and caught sight of where Kunai laid, bleeding and motionless. He ran to her without thought, collapsing onto his knees next to her and pulling her into his arms. He would not lose her.

He leaned down to her mouth, hearing the tiny breath escaping from her lips. He lifted her up, looking around for help. Trodding through the snow, he carried her to the center of the village, crying out for someone, anyone to help.

Three older women ushered him into a hut, gathering the young woman with the promise she'd be fine, she merely needed to be healed. They ushered him out so they could get to work and he collapsed with his back against the hut, cradling his head in his hands.

"Mr. Zuko…"

He looked up to see two bright lilac eyes, tear glazed and terrified, gazing at him. "Is Mama gonna be okay?"

Zuko sighed and took her into his arms, lifting her up and taking her back to the house. He clutched her like a vice, letting her cry into his chest. "Yeah Kameko… she'll be okay."


	9. Betrayal

_**Welcome back for the next chap guys! AN at the bottom my lovelies!**_

_Chap 8  
_

_Betrayal _

Kunai awoke slowly. Memory of the night before crashed into her. She tried to sit up. "Kame-" Pain shot through her torso and she fell back with a squeak.

"Lay back down," came a gruff voice. Kunai glanced over at the far side of the room. Zuko was sitting on the floor next to Kameko's bed, his head cradled in his hands. Kunai looked over at Kameko, who was curled up in bed, sleeping peacefully. At first she sighed in relief. However, as her vision adjusted to the darkness, she saw bandages wrapped around Kameko's small hands, the edges bloodied. She gasped, curling in on herself.

"Her hands…"

"She burnt herself. She'll be fine," Zuko said. Kunai began to tremble, her eyes wide and unfocused.

"I let them take her."

Zuko rolled his eyes at her. "You didn't know."

"I'm a terrible mother. I let them take her. I let them take her. I let them take her." She repeated it again and again in a flat, lifeless mantra.

Zuko clenched his fists. "Azula's dead. I killed my own sister, Kunai." He spoke almost desperately. Where was his sympathy? Where was Kunai?

His words did nothing to faze her as she stared into space, repeating the words over and over again. He looked up at Kunai, her lifeless eyes quivering. "Just forget it!" He stood up and stormed out of the room. Kunai was supposed to feel for him. She was supposed to kiss his head and tell him it would be okay. She was supposed to understand that he had murdered his baby sister. He couldn't remember how many times his mother had told him to protect Azula. Had he forgotten who she'd been? That five-year-old who demanded stories and giggled and always wanted to play with him.

He collapsed when he reached the edge of a cliff overlooking tundra, burying his head in his knees. Tears burned down his cheeks. He'd never felt so ashamed. He'd murdered his sister because he hated her. He'd felt this before, while being prodded by hopeless doctors who swore he'd lose his sight, while standing at the front of a ship filled with the rejects of the navy who hated him. It was the feeling of utter disgust with himself. There was no sinking lower than this.

* * *

"She's not here… _she's not here, dammit!" _Sokka screamed, storming out of the abandoned airship. Aang followed closed behind him. Aang pressed his palms to his temples, shaking his head back and forth. With a desperate growl he fell to his knees.

"No! You mean we went through all this for nothing? I killed Azula for nothing," Aang said. "What do we do now!?"

Sokka gulped and pinched the bridge of his nose. "We need to surprise the fleet. We'll wait a day so they won't expect us and then we'll strike."

"A whole day! But-"

"Well what else is there_ to do, _Aang_!?_" Sokka snapped, turning back to the younger boy with. Aang looked up at Sokka, shocked. "Man up!" Sokka turned away and stormed back to the hut.

Aang growled in frustration. If he just knew where Katara was, if she was okay, what he should do…

_The Spirits! _Aang thought with a gasp. If there was any way to know what had happened to her, this was his best bet. He walked out to the docks, peaceful in the early morning and sat cross-legged. It only took a few to slip into the spirit world.

"Well, hello Aang."

Aang turned around to see Roku, standing with a kind smile, and beamed at him. "Roku! I need your help I-"

"I know why you are here, Aang. I must tell you I do not have the information you seek."

Aang's heart dropped. "What! But-"

"I do, however, know a spirit who can help you."

Once again, a smile split Aang's face. "Really!? Who? Where is he?"

"He is called Takeo, The Spirit of the Warrior. His spirit is young, but he has undeniable connection with the spirit world from his time on Earth. Three years after he came here, he went into a great rage and took on the form of a dragon. He dwells in a cave not far from here watching over true warriors and prisoners. He will deny you any information if he sees you impure of heart or disrespectful. Otherwise, he will give you all the information you need."

Aang nodded. "Thanks Roku!" he called as he took off, running off to find the spirit.

* * *

Kunai had examined Kameko while she'd slept. A bruise along her ribs, a slight red burn along her hip, along with the countless first and second degree burns on her hands. She counted them all and chose equal penance.

She was hated herself, that she would sink so low, yet again. Still, it didn't stop her from taking out her knife and crawling into her bed, hiding her legs beneath the covers from the outside world and dragging the knife across the skin of her thigh. She started with two long, deep cuts for the bruise and the burn and then she let her own instinct take over. She cut until her arm ached and her fingers dripped with blood. She looked down at her mangled flesh and she was satisfied.

She deserved it, after all. She'd let her daughter be taken away and she knew why. It was because of the thickness of Kameko's hair, the tiny dimple in her chin, her thin eyebrows and everything that wasn't her. Crico was in her and that's why she'd left her to die.

As Kunai cleaned her knife she decided this wasn't the last punishment she deserved. When her arm was less sore, when she got another chance, she'd pay full penance.

Right now she had to deal with another issue. Azula was dead. Never mind the fact that she was her boyfriend's sister. Never mind the fact that he'd pleaded to her in a way he rarely had for comfort and had been ignored. All that was important was that Azula was dead and any plans or tactical abilities to hurt Kameko or Ekiri had died with her.

Kunai knelt beside Kameko's bed, watching her for a minute or an hour before the little girl awoke. Kunai smiled and caressed the little girl's cheek.

"Hey baby," she whispered with a broken voice.

Kameko gave a wide, sleepy smile. "You're okay."

Kunai bit her lip, tears welling in her eyes, and nodded. "Yeah, I am. Kameko, I've gotta talk to you about some things, okay? Some big girl things."

Kameko sat up and nodded. Kunai sighed, cupping the toddler's cheek. "I love you… I love you so much but I think you need to go back to live with Ekiri."

Kameko's smile dropped and she stuck out her bottom lip, shaking her head. "No Mama! I wanna stay with you!"

Kunai took in a shaky breath. "Baby, I know but… but Mama just can't take care of you right now."

Kameko let out a frustrated squeal and slammed her fists on the bed. "No! I wanna stay!" She began to cry, curling her knees to her chest. "I'll be a good girl, Mama! I wanna stay! I'll be good!"

Kunai choked and sat on the bed, pulling the little girl to her chest. "Oh baby, you are a good girl. You're the best little girl I could ever want. I'm so sorry." She buried her head into Kameko's messy black tresses and cried, rocking the little girl back and forth. She cried out of guilt, she cried out of anger, and sometimes she wasn't even sure why she was cried, but at some point, she wasn't holding Kameko anymore, doubled over with her head in her hands and Kameko at her side, nuzzling her, whispering "It's okay, Mama."

* * *

While Kameko occupied herself in the corner with her toys, Kunai watched from her bed. She wasn't quite happy. No, not even close. However there was a sense of relief, as if some of the weight on her chest had lifted.

Unbeknownst to her, Zuko stood silently in the doorway. He didn't know why he'd come, whether it was to make amends or demand to know what was wrong with her. He only knew that his plan had changed by the odd look on her face. He resolved to make himself known and see what happened. He sighed as he walked in, and she turned to him in surprise, tensing up. She tried to form a sentence, a simple greeting, yet her throat remained stuck. She was silent as he sat next to her. He watched her out of the corner of her eye, her intense, judgmental gaze boring into his skin. He clenched his fists. "Kunai… you… you shouldn't be so upset about what happened, okay?" He internally scolded himself. He hadn't meant to sound so harsh. He reached out to give a small token of affection, placing his hand on her thigh. He was unprepared for the strangled yelp she let out, jumping away from his grasp.

"What happened to your leg?" he asked.

Kunai scowled and crossed her arms. "Nothing," she said, fresh pain still radiating though her leg.

Zuko frowned. "Kunai, what happened-"

"I heard you the first time! You don't have to repeat it to me like I'm a child! I said _nothing!" _She stood up, standing over him, a scowl marring her face.

Zuko reacted, towering over her. "I wouldn't repeat it if you wouldn't lie to me!"

Kunai leaned in close to him and growled, low and terrifying. "It's none of your damn business."

Zuko stepped back with snarl and stormed out of the room, leaving Kunai seething. She paced about, hands twitching, heart pounding. She wanted to scream, she wanted to cry, she didn't know what she wanted.

"Kameko, Mama's going for a walk, okay?"

She caught a glimpse of Kameko's nod before running out of the room and out into the village. She wanted to be alone. However, her hopes we're crushed when heavy footsteps came up behind her. She looked back to see none other than Toph, sporting a new pair of makeshift boots made of scrap metal.

"Can you see in those?" Kunai asked.

Toph shrugged and plopped down next to her. "Eh. I get around easy enough. So, what's all this yelling between you and Sparky?"

Kunai bit the inside of her cheek. "I just…" She faced two options. She could keep her secrets close, guarding herself behind a barricade of lies or she could open up to a friend and give herself a chance at freedom. She sniffed and swiped her eye. "I'm just really mad at myself." She heaved a heavy, nervous sigh yet she willed herself to continue. "I mean, I let them take my baby away. I let them take her! I wanted to be a good mom; I really did but it just so hard." She shook her head. "I'm a terrible mother."

There was a moment of silence before Toph sighed. "Look. Even though it was kind of a shock that you were actually a mom, I didn't have a hard time seeing you as the mother type."

"What do you mean?"

"You were always taking care of us. And I mean Katara was great and all, before you came along, keeping us out of trouble and whatnot, but you're kinda different. You went exploring with Teo when no one else would, you told the Duke stories and then there was that…. thing."

Kunai chuckled. "We're still not talking about it?"

_Kunai was wandering the temple. She'd been staring at the wall for an hour as sleep refused to come. For all she knew, the rest of the temple was asleep and here she was walking the halls aimlessly. Her walk was rather uneventful until she heard murmurs and the rustle of clothes. She followed it to one of the far off fountains. She held up a fireball to ward of the complete darkness, only to see Toph facing away from her, feet in the fountain and pants-less. _

"_Toph?" _

"_Why are you awake?" Toph demanded. Kunai narrowed her eyes and walked up to her. _

"_Couldn't sleep. What's wrong?" _

_Toph sighed, annoyed. "I woke up and my stomach hurt and there was blood on my pants so I came here to wash off the blood and find where I cut myself or something. But there's no open wound or anything." _

"_Toph!" Kunai exclaimed, kneeling at her side. "Welcome to womanhood. You just started your cycle." _

"_My what?" _

"_No one ever explained this to you?" _

_Toph shrugged. "No."_

_Kunai smiled and began to explain. "Well when girls get a certain age they start a monthly cycle. That's what the blood and the pain is." _

_Toph furrowed her brow. "Wait. Are you telling me that I'm gonna randomly start bleeding and feeling like I'm being ripped in half every month!? Where's the blood even coming from?"_

_Kunai sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "From between your legs, Toph." _

_Toph groaned. "Ugh! That's disgusting." _

_Kunai chuckled, shaking her head. For the next half hour she explained in detail what was going on. She taught the young girl how to wrap and discard rags and offered a few tips to ease the pain in her lower stomach. Toph listened quietly. _

_Kunai nudged her. "Hey. What's wrong?" _

_Toph snorted and crossed her arms, scuffing her foot against the ground. "So what, now I'm a woman I'm gonna change into some girly girl?" _

_Kunai smirked and rested her hand on Toph's knee. "Definitely not. All this means is you're getting older. But it doesn't change who you are. You're not any different. You're still the bad ass Toph we all love." _

_Toph's lips twisted _

_Kunai stood up. "Come on. We both could use some sleep." _

_Toph followed, but just before they got back to the temple, she punched Kunai hard in the arm. "We're never speaking of this again." _

"No. We are still not talking about that," Toph confirmed. Kunai nodded and let out a small chuckle, resting her head in her palm.

"You've always been a big Mama Bear to us, even when we barely knew you. Don't doubt yourself."

Kunai smiled and nudged the younger girl in show of affection. She let out a dry, humorless laugh.

"I don't suppose you have any advice on how to talk to Zuko," Kunai said bitterly.

Toph shrugged, standing up. "All I can say is you should just tell him the truth. Other than that, I can't speak for all your touchy feely emotional mumbo jumbo."

Kunai nodded. "Thanks Toph. For everything."

Toph snorted and walked off.

* * *

It was late afternoon when Kunai started back to the compound. She glanced at the ocean and saw a globe of water, rising up from the surface and rolling onto the shore. Kunai watched in disbelief as the orb broke and Katara emerged, disheveled and exhausted. She collapsed to her knees. Kunai cried out and ran to the younger girl, falling to her side. She grabbed Katara by the shoulders.

"You're alive… oh Tui and La you're alive!" She drew Katara into her arms. Katara shivered and curled into Kunai's embrace for both warmth and comfort.

"Cold."

Kunai nodded fervently and wrapped an arm around Katara's waist, supporting most of her weight as she carried her into the compound. She brought Katara into the main room, setting her down in front of the fire and wrapping her in furs.

"What happened to you?" Kunai asked, bending the water from Katara's hair.

"I f-fell off t-t-the air s-ship."

"You were underwater this whole time?"

"Mm-hmm. W-where are t-the ot-t-thers?"

"In their rooms. Aang went out to meditate and-"

"Guys! Everyone! I know where Katara is!" A joyful voice came tearing through the halls. Kunai and Katara shared a private smile as several groans met the excited Avatar's cry.

"Guys," Kunai called.

Aang slid into the room. "Kunai I- _Katara!" _He launched himself at her, nearly knocking her over with the force of the embrace. Katara chuckled and hugged him back. The rest of the group, save Zuko, who was still off on his own, ran into the room and straight to Katara, engulfing her. Kunai slipped out of the room, leaving old friends to their own devices. She walked back into her room, where Kameko was sitting amongst a pile of toys. She jumped up and scurried to her mother, wrapping her arms around Kunai's leg and flashing an unbridled, gap tooth grin. The gesture tugged at Kunai's heart. Feeble as it was, Kunai managed to smile back and lift the little girl onto her hip, giving her a kiss on the head.

"Hey baby girl. How 'bout you let Mama braid your hair?"

Kameko nodded. Kunai sat down on the bed and placed the little girl between her knees. She brushed through the soft black tangles and began braiding them into pigtails. Kameko bounced and wiggled.

"You gotta sit still, silly." Kunai chuckled, pinching the toddler's cheek. Kameko gave a snort as she shied away, giggling and grinning. Kunai pulled Kameko closer, nuzzling the top of her head with her cheek."Sit still so I can finish your pigtails."

Kameko stilled, her hands twitching in her lap. When she was done, Kunai bent a stream of water from her water-skin and froze it into a mirror, holding it in front of them.

Kameko watched in amazement. "Can I do that Mama?"

"No baby, you're a firebender." Seeing the disappointment on Kameko's features, Kunai distracted her. "Baby, look at your pigtails."

Kameko focused her attention on the mirror. She grasped both of them and giggled, bouncing up and down. "I like piggy-tails!"

Kunai smiled and wrapped her arms around Kameko's middle, kissing her on the temple. "You look beautiful, sweety."

"Mama, can I play outside?" she asked, clasping her hands and poking her bottom lip out. At first Kunai wanted to say no but then she realized she hadn't seen Zuko since he'd stormed outside. If she knew him he was probably just outside somewhere, alone and sulking. She could find him and fix things.

She set the little girl on the floor and wrapped her up in a parka and gloves before slipping on her own jacket and going out into the snow. They walked through the tundra, giggling and throwing snowballs as Kunai searched for Zuko. She found him sitting on a cliff-side, unaware of her presence. Kunai knelt down to Kameko. "I'm gonna go talk to Zuko for a second, okay? Stay where I can see you."

Kameko skipped off while Kunai went over to Zuko. She walked up behind him and started to open his mouth when he said, "What do you want?"

Her already sensitive heart flared at the jab and she almost gave an equally sharp reply. She clenched her fists, willing herself to stay calm, and sat next to him. Tell him the truth, that's what she had to do.

"I cut myself," she said, before she could stop herself. She kept her head down, avoiding Zuko's incredulous gaze. "That's what happened to my leg."

"How'd you cut yourself?" Zuko asked. Kunai looked up at him, silently begging 'Please don't make me say it'. Zuko's amber eyes widened as realization hit him. He'd heard of people cutting themselves when they were depressed, but why would Kunai ever do such a thing to herself?

"Why'd you do it?"

"Because I let them take her."

Zuko growled and dropped his head into his hands. "Again, Kunai? You didn't-"

"Dammit! You don't get it, do you!?" Kunai yelled, turning to him and clenching her fists. She let out a frustrated growl and pressed the heels of her hands to her temples. "I didn't protect her because she scares me! I'm supposed to take care of her and protect her but I didn't because sometimes when I look at her, all I see is _him. _I'm trying to explain this to you so you can understand but you're not even trying to understand, are you?" Hot, angry tears stung her eyes now. "I stopped having nightmares and seeing his face when I was fifteen. I thought it was done and now it's starting all over again! She's my daughter and I almost let her _die_ because she's a nightmare to me!" She couldn't stop the outpouring of words The feeling of release was just too addictive. "You expect me to be here for you when I can't even deal with myself? I sliced my own damn leg! I'm crazy! And as much as I want to be there for you and as much as I know you're hurting, I can't, Zuko! I just can't."

The silence hung in the air, suffocating and resilient, as Zuko couldn't seem to find any words to break it. His Kunai was still in there, still wanting to comfort him. But knowing that she'd purposely cut herself, that she was haunted by such a monster… he'd found someone to rival his pain.

"Let me see."

Kunai clenched her fists. She was struck by memories of nightly checks, being forced to show her scars. But she knew he didn't know any better.

"_Legs too," Emi said sternly. Kunai growled low in her throat and sat back on her bedroll, rolling up the hem of her skirt. It proved difficult with the thick bandages around her wrists. Emi inspected the old scars and searched for new ones, taking a full five minutes until she was satisfied. _

"_Okay, okay." She turned to leave the fifteen- year-olds tent but suddenly stopped._

"_Open up your bag." _

_Kunai froze, her mouth moving wordlessly. Both girls glanced at the bag. Kunai pounced for it but Emi was faster, snatching the bag from under her and dumping its contents onto the floor. _

"_Whiskey, Vodka. What the fuck, Kunai?" _

"_It's my stuff. Back off!" _

"Zuko… I can't. I can't do it."

Zuko started to demand her but Kameko interrupted him, pouncing onto her mother's back. "Mama, I'm cold. Can we go back now?"

"Okay, baby girl. Just give me a second." She gave Kameko a little pat on the back and sent her off to wander before sighing. "I don't want to fight like this."

"Me neither."

Kunai put her hand on his shoulder and placed a feather light kiss on his cheek. "I'm sorry."

The two words spoke for everything. She stood up, offering him the smallest of smiles. "I'll be inside if you need me."

Zuko watched her walk away in confusion and disbelief. She admitted to harming herself, to being haunted through her daughter and then she apologized. In a way he reviled in the trust her showed. However he also despised the feeling of only knowing a few choice details about her old life. Only Kunai could make him this angry and this in love at the same time.

* * *

Zuko returned at dinner to find everyone in high spirits. Aang was sitting next to Katara, blushing every time she touched his arm or gave that girlish, flirtatious smirk. Sokka had an arm around his sister's shoulders. Kameko toddled amongst everyone, striking up conversations and soaking up the attention she received. Even Kunai was smiling off to the side, uttering a few words when acknowledged. Seeing Zuko in the doorway, Sokka waved him in and continued his ghost story. Zuko walked in and sat next to Kunai. She draped her hand on his knee, and he draped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close. Kunai hummed in relief, gently nuzzling his chest.

"I love you," Zuko whispered, his lips grazing her earlobe.

Kunai shivered. "Love you too."

Another hour went by and Kameko yawned in her mother's lap, head bobbing up and down.

"I think it's time for somebody to go to bed," Kunai said.

Kameko shook her head. "I'm not tired."

Kunai smiled and lifted the little girl up onto her chest. "Come on baby. It's late."

Kameko yawned once more, going limp as Kunai laid her in bed. "But I'm… not…"

Kunai let out a quiet chuckle as she tucked a blanket beneath the sleeping toddler's chin.

"Not tired at all."

Kunai turned around and smiled at Zuko. She walked over to him and leaned onto his chest. His lips curled at the edges as he pulled her into him. "I feel like I should feel worse about what happened," he said, not meeting her eye.

Kunai bit her lip with a sigh. "You saved the village. We have a much better chance at winning this thing now. But she was your sister. I don't blame you for being confused."

Zuko shook his head. "But I should feel terrible and-"

A gentle finger on his lips silenced him. "Shh. You can't make yourself feel anything. What do you feel?"

"She made my life miserable! It wasn't because I had to. It was because..." He sighed in dropped his head as all the pieces came together. "Kunai-"

"Don't," she interrupted, placing a hand on his cheek and making him look at her. "You don't have to say a thing."

_Regular updates yay! Thanks so much for all your support and patience guys! I've got big plans for this story in the future and it's gonna get awesome. Go back to the old stories and listen to the playlists if you wanna break your feels! Luv u guys_


	10. A Father's Love

_**An at the bottom**_

_**Chapter 9: A Father's Love**_

"Home sweet home!" Sokka cheered as Appa landed in the courtyard. The red in the horizon was slowly fading into deep blue and everyone was eager to get off Appa. Kameko sat on Kunai's shoulders, her head nuzzled in Kunai's hair. Kunai yawned as she slid off Appa.

"I'm gonna show you your room, okay, Sweetie?" She took Kameko to the room across the hall from hers. It was smaller than the others, the walls painted a soft red and lined with tiny flames. A porcelain doll with rosy cheeks, black hair and a long red silken dress stood atop the dresser with a perpetual expression of pride and content. A deep and brilliant pink canopy hung over the bed and as the light came through the window and filtered through the thin fabric it cast a pink haze across the room.

Kameko gasped. "This is my room?"

Kunai giggled as she lifted Kameko off her shoulders and set her on the bed. "Yep. It's all yours. And Mama's room is just across the hall if you need me. Now it's time to go to sleep."

Kameko crawled up to the headboard, curling into a ball as Kunai tucked her in. Kunai leaned down and kissed Kameko's forehead.

"I love you, Sweetheart."

"I love you too, Mama."

Kunai's heart swelled. She gave her daughter one last kiss before standing up to leave. As she walked out she noticed a glass vase perched on the dresser. If Kameko was playing she could easily bump the dresser, knock over the vase, and get cut. She picked the vase up with every intention of leaving. However, she noticed a wobbly side table that was just the right size for Kameko to try to climb. She knelt down, trying to figure out how to level the table, then finally decided it was easier and safer to just remove the table all together.

On further inspection, she found three nails in the floorboards that could easily trip a young child. The bed was high off the ground, which meant Kameko would hit her head if she rolled off, and the large dresser had small legs and was top heavy.

"What are you doing?" Zuko walked in, a bit confused as to why Kunai was lying on the floor looking under the dresser and holding a vase.

Kunai looked up at him. "Child-proofing."

"Why are you on the floor?"

"Trying to see if I can get the legs off the dresser."

Zuko narrowed his eyes for a moment before shaking his head. He offered her his hand and helped her up. "She's not going to knock the dresser over, Kunai." He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close.

"Okay, fine," she said. "But do you think you could help me move it out then because-"

"Kunai," Zuko interrupted. "Calm down. She'll be okay."

Kunai sighed and dropped her head on his shoulder, letting out a self-deprecating chuckle. "Am I pathetic?"

"Well you… I mean you can be-"

"Is that a yes?"

"I guess?"

"You suck."

Zuko looked down at her. Seeing her smirk, he laughed and kissed her. "I want to show you something."

Kunai frowned up at him. He took her hand and began to lead her down the hallway. As she realized they were going to his room, Kunai's heart began to pound. She stopped and pulled back. "Zuko I-"

"I got you a birthday present."

His spoke softly and hesitantly, and his eyes flickered to the ground. Kunai couldn't help but smile, reassured that his intentions were innocent. She continued with him to his room and he immediately went to the dresser, digging through the drawers and trying to remember where exactly he had shoved the present. Kunai sat down on the bed and lay back, letting her eyes drift clothes as a wave of fatigue fell over her. _I'm not gonna fall asleep,_ she thought.

"Here they are! I thought you would-"Zuko stopped when he turned around to find Kunai deeply asleep. He walked over to her and shook her by the shoulder. She hummed quietly and rolled over. Zuko sighed and put the arm bands on the side table. He slipped her shoes off and placed them beside the bed. He slipped the blankets out from under her and draped them over her, tucking it around her neck how she always slept. As an afterthought, he put the armbands on her. He kicked his shoes off and pulled off his shirt, laying on top of the blankets on the other side of the bed and falling asleep.

Warm. Everything was pleasantly warm. A familiar scent wafted through Kunai's nose as she surfaced from her dreams. A fog clouded her mind as she struggled to break through into reality. She opened her eyes. _This isn't my room, _she thought in confusion. She tried to remember what had happened yesterday when a husky sigh resonated in her ear. Hot breath tickled her neck and an arm tightened around her waist.

She stiffened and sucked in a sharp breath. Zuko was in bed with her. She was in bed with Zuko. She closed her eyes and tried to stay calm. She had all of her clothes on, and they seemed to not have been tampered with. Everything felt normal. She remembered being pulled into his room, lying down on his bed, closing her eyes, and then nothing.

If she hadn't felt so stupid, she would have laughed. She'd fallen asleep in bed and he'd lain down next to her. Slowly, she relaxed and sighed. His grip was firm, his warmth encompassing, and his heartbeat calming. She rolled over to look at him. She gently ran her finger over his parted lips, the tension absent. Smiling, she stroked her hand across his jaw and to his cheek, tracing his scar. It fascinated her. It always had. She'd seen worse scars. Ping, one of her earthbending teachers, had one eye and a dent in his head. Lily, in charge of reconnaissance, had burns all up her body up to her neck. They were badges of courage, reminders of their goal. They were stories told around campfires. His vague explanations- that it had happened during an Agni Kai, that he got it when he'd gotten banished- puzzled her, but she tried not to push. She'd never seen him so distressed except when she'd tried to push the issue.

She wrapped her arm around his ribs and leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. Zuko's eyes shot open, and he let out a squeak of surprise.

Kunai pulled away. "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you."

Zuko shook his head, blinking and trying to wake up. "N-no. That was just… a really great way to wake up."

Kunai blushed and looked away. "You kind of surprised me when I woke up."

"Sorry about that. I tend to gravitate to the warmest thing around."

Kunai shrugged and snuggled closer to him, burying her head in his chest. "It's fine. It's actually kind of nice."

Zuko smiled and kissed her on the head. "Did you notice your armbands?"

Kunai frowned up at him and looked at her arms. Her eyes lit up. "Agni! These are beautiful!"

"Happy birthday," he said with tender hesitance. Kunai looked up and him and, without warning, flung herself at him, knocking him onto his back. "Zuko, you're amazing!"

Zuko laughed in surprise and held her tight. Kunai leaned up to look at him. "I love you."

Zuko smiled and cupped her cheek. "I love you, too."

Her smiled softened as she leaned down and kissed him deeply, pressing into his chest. Zuko hummed and ran his hand up and down her side, tracing memorized curves. With his other hand he tilted her head back, trailing kisses onto her cheek and down her throat, nipping the taut skin. Kunai let out a quiet, breathy moan. "Z-Zuko…" she started, worrying her lip between her teeth.

Zuko pulled away, looking her in the eye. "Do you want me to stop?"

Her first instinct was to say yes, but her heart began to overcome her instinct, and she realized something. Crico's touch had been violent, evil, an invasion of everything she was. It had been meant to make her suffer, to break her. Zuko's touch was always gentle and loving. He kissed her to make her smile and sigh and moan. He'd never hurt her on purpose, and she was sick of treading lightly in fear that he would. Crico had already destroyed her life. She wouldn't let him destroy her relationship. "No."

He smiled and continued, kissing and sucking on the nape of her neck.

Kunai whimpered and closed her eyes. "That feels…really good."

A chuckle rumbled low in Zuko's throat. His hands continued to explore her. One hand stayed tangled in her hair while the other traced her back, drifting lower and lower.

"Mama! Mama where are you!?"Distressed cries came down the hall. Kunai sighed and dropped her head on his shoulder before rolling out of the bed and opening the door. Kameko wandered through the hall, dragging her doll along. Kunai sighed and scooped her up onto her hip. "I'm right here, Baby Girl."

Kameko poked out her lip and crossed her arms. "You weren't in your room."

"I'm sorry, Sweetie. I didn't mean to scare you."

Kameko wrapped her arms around Kunai's neck. "I'm hungry!"

"Let's go see if breakfast is ready." She turned to Zuko who was leaning against the wall. "Coming?"

He smiled and came up behind her as they walked out to the courtyard where the others sat in a circle, eating rice and discussing their plans.

"Morning," Kunai said, taking a seat.

"So what's the plan for today?" Zuko asked as he sat next to her.

"Kunai and I should train," Aang said. "When I was in the spirit world, I met a spirit named Takeo. He told me that you were my greatest ally and we need to learn to work together. He said that I should guide you in the spiritual and you should guide me in my bending."

Kunai nodded. "Guess we can't ignore that."

"Great! There's this spot out on the beach where I can teach you how to meditate," Aang said with a bright grin.

Kunai groaned. "I can't leave Kameko by herself."

"I can watch her for you," Zuko said.

All eyes shot to Zuko. "Really?" Kunai asked.

"Sure. You two train for the rest of the day. I'll take care of it."

Kunai gave a small, private smile and leaned against him. "Kameko, you get to stay and play with Zuko all day. Doesn't that sound fun?"

Kameko nodded and mumbled around a mouthful of jerky. Kunai chuckled and wiped Kameko's face with her sleeve. "And are you going to be bad, or are you going to behave?"

"Have!"

Kunai laughed and kissed Kameko on the head. "I'll see you later, Baby Girl." She looked up at Zuko and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you."

"Bye, Mama!" Kameko called as Aang led Kunai off to the beach.

"The monks used to say that meditation is the key to success. Plus, going into the Spirit World can be really cool."

"I don't know if I could actually get to the spirit world," Kunai said. _Agni knows I've tried. _

Aang waved his hand. "Don't worry about it. You're like a second Avatar!"

Aang continued talking about the basics of meditation, deep breathing, and spiritual and inner peace for the rest of their walk which ended in a small cavern carved into the cliff-side. The water rushed over the rocks, creating a constant white noise and spreading salt into the breeze. Nothing could be seen from the crevice but ocean. The two sat next to each other, cross-legged.

"Now. Just clear your mind and breathe evenly."

"So…" Zuko started awkwardly, standing in Kameko's room.

Kameko ran to her toy bag and retrieved a tattered rag doll in old-fashioned Earth Kingdom robes. "This is Lee. He is a king. You play with Lee," Kameko instructed, thrusting it at him. Once he took it she scrambled onto the bed and grabbed Lala. "Lala loves Lee, but Lee doesn't love Lala."

Zuko sat next to the little girl, turning the doll over in his hands. "Why is that?"

Kameko sat the doll in her lap and began twisting its hair into knots. "Because Lala is a firebender," she said simply. Zuko's eyes widened but he didn't say anything, letting the little girl continue. "Lee doesn't like firebenders. But I like Lala."

Zuko sighed sadly. It didn't take much thought to figure out where her mindset had come from. Growing up as a firebender amongst people who hated her couldn't have done her any good.

"Have you ever seen firebending?"

Kameko nodded. "Yep. I saw a mean man burn a lady once. And sometimes I make sparks."

Zuko sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. His heart sank in his chest. His people had taken over this village, forced it into their own creation. They had twisted this little girl's mind. He had to make up for it. "Do you want to see some firebending?"

Kameko shied away, shaking her head. Zuko leaned down to her, offering a small smile. "I promise I won't burn you, okay?"

Kameko thought for a moment before nodding. "Okay."

Zuko smiled and held his hand out, creating a small flame. His fingers twitched as he manipulated the flame into the shape of a heart, dancing and jumping in his palm. Kameko beamed at him, an awestruck smile splitting her face. He couldn't help but smile back at her. He molded the fire into stars, bouncing them around his fingers before squelching the flame in her fist. Kameko squealed and clapped her hands, bouncing up and down.

"Can I do that? Can I try?"

"Not yet. You'll have to practice a lot before you can do this. If you'd like, though, I can teach you some firebending."

"I wanna learn how to firebend!"

Zuko smiled and ruffled her hair. "All right. We'll ask your Mom when she gets back."

Zuko couldn't remember any time he'd laughed so much. Maybe it was because he'd gotten stuck under the bed during hide-and-seek or maybe it was because Kameko gave him a lecture about the proper voice to use for Lee, but he'd been laughing for two hours straight. He had clips and ribbons stuck in his hair. Kameko had said it was too messy. The task of watching a rambunctious toddler had been daunting but he'd never had so much fun in his life.

Even with all that in mind, he was exhausted.

He sat on the bed, Kameko nestled in his lap, watching her rock her doll in her arms and hum a lullaby. When she was satisfied Lala was asleep, she set her on the pillow. She looked at Zuko, narrowed her eyes and then smacked her hand onto the left side of his face.

"Ow! Kameko, why-"

"Mr. Zuko, what's this?"

Zuko froze. He'd never told the complete story of his scar, only lies and dismissive explanations. His shipmates never asked, and anyone who ever dared to ask had been attacked. The only people who truly knew had been there or had been brainwashed by propaganda. He couldn't even come up with the words to explain it to his girlfriend- how could he explain it to her child?

"It's my scar. I got hurt," he said, closing his eyes. He stiffened as she poked and prodded the scarred flesh. He wondered what kind of monster he was in the eyes of a three-year-old.

"How'd you get hurt?"

"I got burned by a very bad man." He kept his eyes shut, waiting for her response when he felt lips press against his forehead.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Zuko."

He looked at her face, full of innocent sympathy. He covered her hand with his. He tried to conjure a smile to cheer her up, but his heavy heart would not allow it. "It's okay, Kameko."

Kameko relaxed back into him, resting her head back on his chest. "I'm sleepy."

Zuko hooked his arms under her armpits to put her on bed. She squealed in response and lifted her arms up, sliding out of his grip. "No. I want you to stay with me."

Zuko sighed and laid back, holding her firmly on his chest. "Okay, Kameko. I'll stay here until you fall asleep."

"Zuko? Zuko."

Zuko groaned as he began to awake, bright purple eyes awaiting him.

Kunai smiled. "Hello, sleepy head."

Zuko began to sit up when she waved her hands for him to stop. "Wait, wait, wait. You'll wake her."

He looked down at the girl curled up on his chest, secure in his grip. He was almost reluctant to let Kunai take her from his arms. Kameko mumbled incoherently, still asleep. Kunai held her on her chest for a moment, whispering in Kameko's ear and patting her back until she relaxed once more. Kunai gingerly laid the girl down on the bed.

Zuko scrubbed his eyes with the heel of his hand. "She, uh, wanted me to stay with her while she went to sleep."

Kunai put her hands on his knees and leaned forward, just inches from his face. "You're amazing, you know that?"

Zuko narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean?"

"That you watched a toddler all day for me and did a pretty great job." She pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. "She should be out for the rest of the night. Come on. Dinner's ready." She took him by the hand and led him outside to the courtyard.

The group began to snicker when they saw the pair.

"I like your new hairstyle, Zuko." Katara chuckled. Zuko flushed, suddenly remembering the clips and bows stuck in his head. He frantically ripped them out, trying to ignore the laughter. Kunai nudged him with her hip, giving a smile that promised their laughter was well-intentioned. He sighed and sat down in the circle, taking the bowl of rice from the center of the table.

He looked over at Aang. "How was training?"

Kunai and Aang shared a glance before Aang sighed. "Well, we did make a lot of progress on our bending," he said with false optimism.

"But as far as spiritually, we're not going anywhere," Kunai said. "I don't think we ever will. You two should start back your training tomorrow."

"It could just be we're both spiritually blocked. I don't know what chakras you're having problems with, but I'm pretty sure mine have to do with killing Azula." Aang dropped his head and sighed.

"What are you talking about? You didn't kill her," Zuko said with a scowl.

Aang looked up and shook his head. " I hit her with a fireball from the ship."

"But I saw her get hit. I thought…" He dropped his head into his hand, shaking his head in disbelief.

"So I guess we both killed her. So it's almost like neither of us did?" Aang said to himself, thoughtfully scratching his head.

"How is it like that at all?" Zuko snapped.

Aang shrugged. "There's no way we could possibly know. We both hit her, so I guess it doesn't matter whose fireball killed her."

Zuko sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, turning the idea over in his head. "Yeah… yeah I guess you're right," he mumbled, not wanting to argue.

The rest of the meal continued quietly, a few conversations sprinkled throughout. When they were done, Kunai took Zuko's hand. "Can we talk after I check on Kameko?"

Zuko nodded and followed her to Kameko's room. Kunai smiled at the sleeping child and readjusted the blankets, pressing a kiss to her forehead. She turned back to Zuko and motioned him to follow her and went to her room. They sat next to each other on the bed. Kunai wrapped and arm around his shoulders. "How are you feeling?"

Zuko sighed and dropped his head into the crook of her neck. "Confused."

"Can I tell you what I think?"

Zuko gave a quiet grunt of agreement.

"You did nothing wrong and this proves it. Aang had the exact same instinct you did."

"I know. I feel a little better, but at the same time, I just don't know."

Kunai grazed her fingertips across the base of his neck and kissed his forehead. "It's okay to be confused."

They stayed in comfortable silence for some time, wrapped in each other's embrace. After a few minutes Kunai sighed. "Zuko, I wanna show you."

"What are you-" He cut himself off as he look at her face, downturned, her lips pressed into a thin line and eyes squeezed shut.

"Are you sure?"

Kunai nodded and began to roll her pant leg up. Her hands quaked, but she'd already made her choice. She pushed the fabric to her upper thigh and dropped her head, unconsciously tracing every scar with her finger.

Zuko stared in shock. He'd assumed there would be a few light scratches, not gashes fitting of a war story. He tried to imagine how anyone could harm themselves to this magnitude. He couldn't.

_In front of over a hundred warriors, a thirteen year old girl stood, her puffed out chest and strong jaw opposed by the tears dripping down her cheeks. "Tonight, we honor a great warrior. He wasn't just the Great Dragon," she said. "He wasn't just a warrior. He was our friend. He was my brother." _

_She slid up her sleeve, pointing to a bright red dragon on her shoulder. "I got this without knowing he would die in two weeks. But I'm glad I did. I will remember his strength, his passion, his inner fire, his power, and his grace." _

_She closed her stinging eyes. "That's how he would want to be remembered. Tonight, we celebrate my brother." She raised her glass and her head, looking up to the sky. She'd be there with her brother soon. When she could slip away from the memorial and into her tent, she would go there with him. _

"_To Gorou!"_

"I started cutting when I was thirteen, after my brother died," she explained. Still not making eye contact, she held her wrists out to him.

"I attempted suicide four times. Slit my wrists twice. The tattoos cover up the scars but you can still feel them." She glanced up.

Taking the invitation, he grasped her hand and ran his thumb over her wrist. He could feel the scar tissue, stiff and irregular. Deep, violent cuts. He drew away and she dropped her arms, a ragged and shaky sigh tearing through her throat.

"I tried the first time the week after he died. I cut one of my wrists and my friends found me before I bled out. Everything got worse after-"

"You don't have to say it," he whispered.

Kunai nodded. "I cut a lot while I was pregnant, but I didn't try to end it again until after she was born. It was a week after she left and I was still really weak and sick. My friends had left all the medicine in my tent, and I'd gotten drunk and taken them all. I passed out and threw up in my sleep so I didn't overdose. The second time was on the anniversary of my brother's death. I slit both my wrists like this." She ran her fingers from the base of her palm up to her forearm. "You bleed out faster that way. I barely got through that. They found me without a heartbeat. One of my friends was a waterbender and somehow, they got me through. The next time was actually a few months before we met. I drank myself numb and took a bunch of random medications and cut my wrists. I really don't know how I made it that time, but I did. After that attempt failed, I realized I had to change. I stopped drinking and doing drugs, and I stopped cutting. For a while."

She pointed to the newest scabs. "These are from when we first got here, and these are from the South Pole."

"That recent?" Zuko whispered.

Kunai shrugged. "I felt so guilty." She forced herself to sit up straight and rolled her pant leg down. "I need to stop," she declared, mostly to herself. "I have to take care of my daughter and stop punishing myself."

"But?" Zuko asked, hearing the distant and rehearsed tone.

She was silent for a moment, not trusting her voice. When she'd managed to compose herself, she said, "It's hard. And scary."

Zuko put a finger on her chin and turned her head to look at him. The moment she met his eyes, she fell over the edge and collapsed into his chest. Zuko held her tight, cradling her quivering body.

"Y-you don't know how much I need you now," she choked through her sobs, gripping his shirt. Zuko looked down at her in surprise, but didn't question her words. He buried his face in her hair and let her cry until her sobs subsided and turned to hiccups.

"I've never told anyone this," she whispered hoarsely.

"I haven't told you enough," he replied.

Kunai sniffed and looked up at him, the tiniest smile on her tear-striped face. She stroked his cheek with her knuckle. "It's not a contest, stupid." She lay back on his chest and sighed deeply, holding him around the stomach. "Will you stay with me tonight?"

"Do you want me to?" he asked.

"Yeah. I do."

_**Hey guys! A little info and it's really important. **_

_**1. We're 3 or 4 chapters until the end of this installment and we'll be starting the next and last part of this trilogy!**_

_**2. I need help for a name for the last installment. Something fun and nice and light hearted...**_

_**did you actually fall for that? **_

_**Nothing i make is lighthearted. MWAHAHAHAHAAAAA**_

_**3. I'm so happy for all your suports guys and i cant wait for some more reviews and fanart and drabbles and adds. Love you guys!**_


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